sinusitis

The next chapter: June 2025 update

/ Melanie Marttila

My ongoing burnout journey and the desire for definitive change.

This is a loooong post (mostly because of the media I consumed). You have been warned.

Life in general

I held off writing anything in this section until mid-June because not much was happening. I was trying to regulate and improve my sleep hygiene and just feel my feelings.

I thought that my seasonal allergies had peaked on June 1st, but after a few days of feeling okay, forest fire smoke encroached, and my sinuses started socking in. I’ve been fighting off the sinusitis again. This has meant that my sleep has suffered. So, my rest has not been restful.

My main revelation in June was that I have been experiencing my emotions, but due to various stresses, I’ve been ignoring them. Alexithymia and proprioception issues predominate when my sympathetic nervous system is engaged, and mine has been for much of the past two years.

I’ve been people pleasing too much and need to let others manage their own emotions and their own work. Moving into caregiver territory with my mom means that can be complicated, because there are some forms of emotional (and other) labour I need to take on, but I can take a step back and ask myself if a particular task is something I absolutely must do.

I got an interim medical note at the beginning of the month but, as of the end of the month approached, I was still waiting on the formal medical to be completed and returned. I called the week after my phone appointment with my doctor and was told that I would be called when the medical was ready for pick up. On the 25th, I called again, and the receptionist advised that the form had been completed on the 5th (!) and that I would have been called. No one called me. I checked my call log. So, I went in and picked it up and tried not to have a complete meltdown.

Something else I noticed when I logged on to submit my note to my team lead and manager was that deductions for last year’s leave with income averaging continued to be deducted from my pay. The deductions started one or two pays before I went on my leave and should have stopped. I wasn’t in any rush to fix this as I wasn’t suffering financially, and the longer I let things go, the more money I’d get back when the issue was fixed.

My work laptop was also due for replacement. That, too, I was in no rush to deal with.

With the solstice, the heat arrived. We went from relatively mild spring weather to full on heatwave. With only a portable AC unit for the bedroom, all we could do was close all the windows in the house during the day, set the furnace fan to circulate, and turn on every ceiling fan in the house. Still, it was sweat-while-you’re-sitting weather. Enter heat edema and rashes.

We got a lovely respite toward the end of the month before the heat began to ramp up again.

The month in writing

My cutting pass of Reality Bomb continued. Around mid-month, I passed -1,000 words. By month’s end, I’d managed -1,444 words. I have a feeling (a hope?) that there will be much more cutting in the second half of the novel.

I also finished reading a few review books and started on their reviews. I decided that I’d finish the reviews before getting back to RB. Of course, I wrote short reviews for my What I’m watching and reading section, but I hope to place longer reviews in journals.

I also started writing a creative non-fiction piece, wrote another poem, and made a couple of poetry submissions.

In writing business, I attended the Wordstock Special Virtual meeting on the 4th. This was the festival in jeopardy I mentioned last month. The membership voted to save the organization and rebuild the festival, but whether a festival will happen this year is up in the air. Though a call for volunteers went out, I was not able to contribute.

The Canadian Authors Association annual general meeting (AGM) was on the 21st. Everyone is feeling the impact of funding cuts and memberships are demanding in-person events that may be beyond their organization’s capacity. 

The League of Canadian Poets AGM was on the 24th. More of the same, but in this case, the membership voted in favour of an in-person event with hybrid options in 2027. We’ll see how things go.

And the SF Canada Board had an ad-hoc meeting on the 30th to clear up some bits and bobs.

Filling the well

The full strawberry moon in Sagittarius was on the 11th. I took some lovely pics leading up to the full. The forest fire smoke really made the moon look pink.

Speaking of strawberries …

Summer arrived on the 20th. Did my altar thing, switched over my seasonal scents, and generally tried to focus on recovery.

The new hawthorn moon in Cancer was on the 25th. Overcast skies meant pics were hard to come by, though I got a couple, later in the month.

In writing-related events, the monthly virtual TWUC Ontario Open Mic was on the 10th. I was happy to sit in and listen to some fellow members read from their work.

On Friday the 13th, I watched an Authors Publish webinar with Cat Rambo, “How to Write Captivating Side Characters.” Cat’s always a fun and informative presenter.

I attended the Canadian Authors Association and SF Canada webinar Playing the Short Game with Douglas Smith. I’m not a prolific short fiction writer, but the information was excellent.

There was another Authors Publish webinar on the 25th. Erin Swann presented “How to Create and Maintain Authentic Connections with Your Readers.” It was principally about showing and telling, which is something I still struggle with.

And, on a whim, I signed up for a two-part webinar from Free Expressions. The first session of “Tricking your brain into plotting” with Janice Hardy was on the 26th. Hardy introduced cause and effect question chains, idea baiting, conflict loops, flaw mining, and moral mirrors. In July, we’ll delve deeper into the techniques. I think I’ll like these techniques in action as a pantser/plantser.

I had a phone appointment with my doctor on the 4th and got an interim medical note for my leave as well as a referral for therapy. I have a feeling I’ll still need support after my sessions through EAP run out.

I had an appointment with my RMT on the 11th. Though I still reached rest and digest mode, I was in pain for weeks afterward. I’ve been holding a lot of tension in my body.

My next appointment with my EAP therapist was on the 16th. This time, my assignment was nervous system regulation, specifically stim toys. I’m not eager to go shopping. It’s exhausting. But I have found an old necklace that works as a stim toy. I’ll see what I can figure out on my own before I spend money.

I booked Torvi for her next Furminator on the 19th. With the hot weather, her shedding was in overdrive, and she was shaggy pants doggo.

I attended another in the PFLS sleep series webinars on the 24th. This one was about daylight saving time, its myths and health risks. It was a good session with lots of research on the harmful effects of DST. Unfortunately, politicians do not want to stop DST because of business and shipping issues.

My support group met on the 25th and the topic this month was work life balance, another thing I struggle with.

What I’m watching and reading

During my leave, I’ve been indulging in movies. Brace yourselves. There are a lot of them!

I watched Captain America: Brave New World (Disney +). It wasn’t a bad movie. It wasn’t even a bad Marval movie, but Harrison Ford’s President Ross/Red Hulk stole some of the attention away from Sam and Isaiah’s stories. Joaquin Torres, the new Falcon, was sidelined partway through the movie, and though there were some solid fight scenes, the climactic moment is a quiet one and therefore … anticlimactic. I was also a little put off by the decision to rewrite Sabra, who was an Israeli agent in the comics, as a former widow. There were other changes to casting and scripting that resulted in a movie that, in my opinion, felt scattered. If you try to please everyone, you end up pleasing no one.

Then, I watched Moana 2 (Disney +). The “I want” song, “To Go Beyond,” made me weepy, which made me happy, because it’s been a long time since I’ve felt that. And the story was lovely. Moana is made a tautai, or master wayfinder, and she receives a vision from her ancestor tautai Vasa that she must find the island of Motufetu and restore the ocean currents to reunite all the island peoples, because alone, Moana’s people will die. So, Moana embarks of a risky adventure. It’s all about persistence and the power of community. Enjoyed immensely.

Then, I watched Dead Like Me: Life after Death (Prime). Phil and I had watched and enjoyed the series in the way back and I knew the movie existed, but I hadn’t actually watched it until now. In the opening scene, George and the other reapers stand outside Der Waffle Haus as it burns. Soon, they are summoned by their new head reaper, Cameron, who tells them that Rube finally “got his lights.” George suspect there’s something wrong when she can’t reap her first assignment. Chaos ensues. A fun bit of nostalgia.

I watched the documentary Brats (Disney +). Andrew McCarthy, seeking some meaning or closure decades after the “Brat Pack” achieved notoriety, interviews many of the members of, and actors peripheral to, the pack. McCarthy and Emilio Estevez still share resentment about being called brats that even an interview with David Blum, the entertainment journalist who coined the term Brat Pack couldn’t dispel. Demi Moore, Ally Sheedy, and Lea Thompson are more measured in their responses, as are Timothy Hutton and Jon Cryer, all of whom have had successes beyond the Brat Pack era. It’s Rob Lowe who sheds the most light on the issue and provides a positive spin. They were the new wave of cinema and informed many of the movies in following decades. The documentary ends with McCarthy finally getting a call back from Judd Nelson, paying off the running gag throughout the film that Nelson was purposely making himself unavailable. Nelson never appears. A thought-provoking and nostalgic film.

Next, I finished watching Beef (Netflix). Two characters enter each others’ orbits through an incident of road rage. A massive number of poor decisions on both their parts ends with one of them shot and in intensive care in the hospital and the other recovering by his side. Maybe life goes on?

Then, I watched The Residence (Netflix). This little gem is Knives Out meets Scandal meets The Extraordinary Birder. The Head Usher of the White House is murdered, and Cordelia Cupp, the world’s best detective and avid birder, is brought in to find out whodunnit. In a second timeline, a future congress hearing tries to get to the root of the mystery. There are loads of red herrings, but all the clues are presented as each suspect is investigated. The final meeting in which Cupp unveils the murderer is a bit unusual in that Cupp announces that she has no idea who the culprit is, but as she works through the events of the night of the murder, she zeroes in on the guilty party. Very entertaining. I hope they continue the series.

I watched They Cloned Tyrone (Netflix). This movie is classified as an SF comedy mystery. I’d replace mystery with horror myself. Fontaine is a drug dealer and is shot by a rival while collecting payment from client, friend, and pimp, Slick. When Fontaine shows up the next day looking for his payment, Slick and one of his girls, YoYo, know something’s wrong. Together, the three uncover a secret underground compound that reminds me of the facility in Supacell (which came out a year later), where experiments are being conducted on clearly unwilling Black subjects. The reveal of the purpose of this secret project is combined with an interesting twist that speaks to internalized racism. The ending promises that the trio’s adventures will continue.

I checked out the live action remake of Snow White (Disney +). Everyone should know the story, so I’m not worrying about spoilers. There were a few new songs that I wasn’t sure were needed, though Gal Godot isn’t horrible (?) as the evil queen, and they changed up the story. Instead of a prince, we have Jonathan, a Robin Hood-esque leader of a band of freedom fighters. There is a little more attention paid to the dwarves, which I liked, and Snow has more agency. She confronts the evil queen/stepmother, who ends up being consumed by her own magic mirror. Apples are more symbolically present as well, as a symbol of the healthy, happy, communal kingdom, as well as the evil queen’s assassination method.

Then, I watched Okja (Netflix). Oh, my god, y’all. It was devastating. Yes, it’s another Bong Joon Ho jam and has his signature surreal social commentary. Tilda Swinton (in her dual role as twins) and Jake Gyllenhaal chew up every scene they’re in, but damn this one’s sad.

Lucy Mirando becomes CEO of the Mirando Corp and presents herself as an environmentalist. 26 “super pigs”—a genetically engineered species that looks like a hippo—have been placed with farmers around the world. They consume less, produce less greenhouse gas, and, as Mirando says, they taste good. At maturity, the best super pig will be selected, and then . . . the livestock will go into production.

Mija has raised Okja from a piglet in South Korea. When Dr. Johnny Wilcox declares Okja the best super pig, the Mirando team ship her to Seoul (en route to New York). A heartbroken Mija follows. As Mija finds the truck Okja is in and dangles from the back of it, a group of animal liberation front (ALF) activists free Okja. They replace the black box that has recorded Okja’s biological data with a recording device and intend to send her back to Mirando to record the atrocities committed against the super pigs after which they will break her out again. Mija wants to go back to the mountains with Okja, but the ALF translator says she agrees. A note here: the ALF members are little better than Mirando and are totally complicit in what happens to Okja and the other super pigs.

Things go horribly wrong for Okja after that and though Mija manages to save Okja in the end, hundreds of other super pigs are still sent to processing. An excellent movie but brace yourselves.

Next, I finished watching the first season of Super Team Canada (Crave). This silly and self-deprecating (i.e., thoroughly Canadian) animated series from Atomic Cartoons is … okay? I wanted to check it out because of the voice talent—Cobie Smulders, Will Arnett, and Kevin McDonald, in particular. Also, Bryan Adams wrote the theme song.

I didn’t appreciate the animation style, and the team itself caters to stereotypes. Niagara Falls (Smulders) controls water and is an environmental crusader. Breakaway (Arnett) is a hometown hockey player with explosive pucks. Chinook is an Inuit hero who generates ice. Her shamanic aunties make appearances. Poutine … blasts his namesake and is obsessed with sex/himself. Ew? RCM-PC is a robotic mailbox. Sasquatchewan is their tank. And the PM (McDonald) looks like John A. McDonald and presents as a harried white-collar worker. The stories are nonsensical (I know that’s the point).

It feels like this series was thrown together last year when it became apparent that Trump was going to win again, even though the President looks like Bush (Jr). Essentially, the team can’t work together and lucks out more often than not. A solid meh.

As a departure from the heartbreak of Okja, my next movie was Renfield (Netflix). I knew it would be total camp and that’s what I was looking for. Robert Montague Renfield is Dracula’s familiar (read bug-eater) and in the modern day, he’s still tasked with finding his master victims. In search of people no one will miss, Renfield attends a support group for people in codependent and abusive relationships and grabs horrible people for his master. One of these missions goes horribly wrong when a mob executioner comes to kill one of Renfield’s chosen victims. Renfield ends up killing the executioner and gets entangled in the ensuing police investigation. Of course, Renfield also takes the advice of his support group and tries to escape his abusive relationship while the mob boss encounters Dracula and makes a deal with the vampire. Light and fun. Totally illogical climax and denouement, but it was the palate cleanser I needed.

Then, I finished the full run of Legion (Disney +). Because David Haller (Legion) is the son of Charles Xavier and an omega-level mutant, this series constantly asks you to question reality and rationality. Is what you’re seeing in David’s head, the astral plane, or is it the real (and surreal) world? Is David a powerful mutant or is he truly mentally ill? Maybe he’s both.

David is adopted and when his powers manifest, he’s diagnosed with schizophrenia and institutionalized. Years later, he escapes with the help of another inmate (Sydney) who can switch consciousnesses with anyone she touches. David and Syd are picked up by Summerland operatives and eventually, it becomes apparent that David has a dark passenger, Amahl Farouk, the Shadow King, who has been manipulating him throughout his life. Dark and often confusing, Legion nonetheless has a compelling story. David is an (extremely) unreliable narrator and does some truly despicable things during his journey. Thought-provoking.

Next, I watched Argylle (Apple TV +). This fun but over-the-top spy comedy was directed by Matthew Vaughan of Kingsman fame. Having watched all three Kingsman movies (The Secret Service was fun, The Golden Circle too convoluted to be truly enjoyable, and the third, The King’s Man, such a departure in tone from the previous two I wasn’t sure what to make of it), I was expecting wacky. What I got was a movie that overwhelmed my ability to suspend my disbelief. I’mma just spoil it. It won’t affect your viewing if you still want to watch it.

Elly Conway is a spy thriller novelist who’s trying to finish her latest novel. After her mother offers a critique, she finds herself blocked. On the train to visit her mother, Elly is attacked and then saved by Aiden Wilde, an actual spy. Wilde tells Elly that her books reflect real events and that she must finish her novel to help Wilde and his superior, Alfie (also the name of Elly’s Scottish fold cat who experiences some serious abuse in the movie) take down the bad guys. When they reach Alfie (the spy, not the cat), he reveals that Elly is agent R. Kylle (which she transformed into Argylle) and that she is the spy she’s been writing about the whole time (the whole time!).

Things get surreal from there. Elly’s parents aren’t her parents! She remembers who she is! Elly’s one of the bad guys! But no, she’s not; she was just acting! Then she’s triggered ala Winter Soldier! It culminates in this LSD-fuelled final battle in which agents Kylle and Wilde dance/fight amid multi-coloured smoke bombs and then Elly drives knives into her boot soles, skates on spilled oil, and stabs the rest of the baddies. At the very end, as Elly is launching her final Argylle novel, the “real” Argylle identifies himself in the audience. A mid-credit scene shows a young Argylle to be one of the Kingsmen.

Wha?

I also decided to keep up with my reading while I was off and so there are a lot of books I read in June! Sorry, not sorry!

I read Swordheart by T. Kingfisher (Ursula Vernon). The more T. Kingfisher books I read, the more I want to read. Halla is a widow who’s become housekeeper for her uncle-by-marriage. When he dies and leaves everything to her, the rest of his family imprisons Halla until she agrees to marry a sweaty-palmed cousin, after which Halla is certain they will kill her to get her inheritance themselves. In desperation, Halla determines to un-alive herself so that her remaining blood relatives might benefit from the inheritance, but when she draws a sword to do the deed, Sarkis, the immortal warrior bound to the sword and whomever wields it, appears.

Halla is adorable and babbles in a very ND manner. Sarkis is largely confused but determined to do his best. As with other Kingfisher novels, they end up saving each other. LOVED!

Then, I listened to Summon the Keeper by Tanya Huff. This is the first book in the Keeper Chronicles, the third of which I read a year or so ago. Keeper Claire Hansen is summoned to the Elysian Fields Guesthouse where the owner absconds and leaves her holding the deed, and the responsibility for a portal to hell in the furnace room, a sleeping keeper-gone-evil, the ghost of a French sailor, and an elevator that takes its passengers to other worlds. Will Claire, her cat Austin, and the guesthouse’s cook Dean be able to sort it all out before Claire is permanently bound to the site? Claire’s sister and Mom make appearances as well. A lovely start to an enjoyable series.

I finished reading Beneath the Rising by Premee Mohamed. Described as Lovecraft Country meets All the Birds in the Sky, this novel combines cosmic horror with the story of two childhood friends who may (or may not) love one another as they travel the world to stop Them from breaking through. Sounds improbable you say? It does, until you realize that one of the two teen protagonists is a wunderkind who has single-handedly cured disease, helped stop plastic pollution and runaway climate change, and practically put an end to poverty. Johnny (Joanna) is all that and a bag of chips, but she’s got secrets. When her latest invention, a functioning fusion reactor that promises to provide the world’s energy needs, “calls” to Them, Johnny destroys her invention and all its blueprints, sends her friend Nick’s family into hiding, and sets off on a journey with Nick to close the gate between this world and Theirs.

As Johnny’s secrets come to light, Nick questions everything and must confront the person he thought was his best friend. Even victory is a tragedy in this one, folks.

Next, I listened to The Witches of Moonshyne Manor by Bianca Marais. Moonshyne Manor is a distillery and the hereditary home of the Sisterhood—six octogenarian witches, one of whom has been in prison for 33 years for a heist that resulted in the death of another of their number, who lingers as a ghost, communicating through her familiar, a crow named Widget. A mob of angry men want to demolish the manor and build a men’s fantasy retreat. Another man, a relative of Ivy, who inherited the manor, wants what he believes was stolen from him. Behind on their mortgage payments—the reason the mob is using to validate their destructive scheme—Queenie, has made a dire deal with Charon. The fates of the manor and the Sisterhood hang on the release of Ruby, who knows where the stolen goods are hidden, but when she returns to the manor, she is not the woman she used to be. Enter Persephone, a young feminist who wants to save the manor and the Sisterhood, if she could just understand the web of relationships and betrayals that binds the sisterhood together. Excellent!

Then, I finished reading Christy Climenhage’s The Midnight Project. Raina and Cedric are disgraced genetic engineers who run a bespoke reproduction assistance clinic in Long Harbour, Labrador, during what we might describe as the pre-apocalypse. They admit to being idealistic/naïve in failing to ensure their last contract included a clause to prevent the use of their gene editing method in ways which would result in destruction to ecosystems. Because that’s exactly what happened. The company they worked for used their gene editing technique to produce insect-resistant crops (Monsanto, anyone?). When bees and other beneficial pollinators began to die, the company blamed Raina and Cedric, fired them, and bound them with non-disclosure agreements so that they couldn’t even defend themselves.

As more and more species go extinct, climate change threatens coastal cities, and gangs of hoppers—rogue genetic modification attempts gone horribly wrong and released into an unsuspecting world—hunt humans, Raina and Cedric are barely getting by. Enter billionaire Burton Sykes, who says he wants them to create a viable—and more importantly ethical, even noble—human hybrid capable of riding out the coming global destruction in the depths of the ocean. While they are savvier in their contract negotiations this time, when they see signs that Sykes is not abiding by the terms of that contract, Raina and Cedric must take action to protect themselves and the nascent Ceph they’ve come to love. A thought-provoking and entertaining read.

Next, I finished We Bury Nothing by Kate Blair (coming Oct 2025). This engaging young adult mystery is written in dual timelines. While I think the first chapter would have worked better as a prologue, I understand that most editors and publishers aren’t fond of them. The chapter stands out because it’s not explicitly part of either timeline and is written from a point of view that doesn’t return in any other part of the novel. Prologues are okay when they serve a purpose, and chapter 1 works better as a prologue, in my opinion.

But I digress. Chapter 1 is from the point of view of George, a young guard at a German POW camp in the fictitious town of Westonville during WWII. He discovers the body of Erich Stein, one of the prisoners in the camp. There’s no indication of how he escaped, only that a wound on his head was the likely cause of his death. George knows Erich and weeps over the waste of a young life.

The first timeline tells Erich’s story, from the long train ride to Camp 43 to his untimely death.

In the present day, Keira has come to Westonville as one of several high school graduates to work at the Heritage Site that Camp 43 has become. She, Asha, Ephram, and Ruth submitted proposals for projects to work on over the summer all related to Camp 43. They’re all trying to get the Hopper Scholarship, which will pay for a full university degree. Keira’s project is to solve the mystery of Erich Stein’s death, and the scholarship is her only hope of attending university.

But when Ruth is found drowned after a local party, Keira finds herself trying to solve two mysteries and as the clues come together, she realizes the deaths—no, murders—are related. A fascinating and well-written novel. Loved!

I raced through Maggie Stiefvater’s The Listeners. This one’s a Mary Poppins read—practically perfect in every way! The Listeners is Stiefvater’s debut adult novel, and it was one of those reads that, while I almost couldn’t put it down, I was also already mourning the end of a story and world I wanted to stay in. And the characters! I subscribe to her Substack (surprise, surprise!) and in a recent post, Stiefvater said she stives to create reading experiences that invite return and study. She’s done that in spades. Adored!

June Porter Hudson is the general manager of the Avallon Hotel in West Virginia when the US enters WWII and is blindsided by the owner’s decision to offer the hotel to the government as a place to house foreign nationals (read Axis diplomats and their families) until they can safely return them to their home countries. Tucker Minnick is an FBI agent on a quest for redemption. This diplomatic mission may be his last. Complicating matters is the hotel’s sweetwater, which bubbles up in hot and cold springs and is pumped throughout the hotel. It takes on the emotions of the hotel’s patrons, which is why June strives to ensure everyone’s happiness. But with the Avallon’s current occupants, the sweetwater is taking on a lot of negativity. And when the sweetwater is unhappy, bad things happen.

June is the Avallon. Tucker is the Agency. Can they come together to save what they love?  

Then, I read Tom Leduc’s Palpitations. This is Tom’s second poetry collection published by Latitude 46. The poet states that each poem in this collection represents a “spark that can burn out in the dark or set the world on fire.” Divided into five sections, Leduc recounts the palpitations that have shaped his life. He admits that some poems may be made up but cannily declines to say which ones.

The first section, Freefall, addresses the palpitations of high school, sexual awakening, fumbling first love, and the legacy of familial wounds. Opposing Influences dances between youth and age, family life and relationships never realized, spirituality and religion. These palpitations are full of reflection, realization, and regret. The Night We Burned the Dragon’s Head is about rites of passage, revisiting the past, speculating about the future, and settling into the mindful present. The fourth section, Murmuration of Covid, may be self-explanatory, but the moments of the pandemic, a Christmas without family, queuing for vaccinations, the fifty-seventh covid test, physical distancing, and Zoom meetings are all worth revisiting. We were all there. The Marble King is populated with favourite places, things, people, and body parts, moments of crisis, and moments of dissolution.

Palpitations is a worthwhile read. You will resonate with each moment.

I gave the audiobooks a break toward the end of the month and listened to Dan Carlin’s Hardcore History: The Supernova in the East parts 1 through 6. Each episode of the podcast was about 4 hours long (!) It happened to dovetail with some of the other historical reading/research I was doing.

And that was the month in this writer’s life.

Until next month, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!

The next chapter: A month in the writerly life. https://melaniemarttila.ca

I acknowledge with respect that I am in Robinson-Huron Treaty territory, that the land from which I write is the traditional territory of the Anishinaabe and home of Atikameksheng Anishnawbek and Wahnapitae First Nation.

The next chapter: December 2024 update

/ Melanie Marttila

Settling into recovery mode … (cue olde-timey modem squealing)

Picture of the quarter moon above a tree.

Life in general

The illen settled in, but I hadn’t yet gotten headaches, facial pain, or any of that ilk, so I continued on with the neti-pot, Emergen-C, and Advil Cold & Sinus. If things got worse, I figured I’d go to the clinic as I’d done in the past and see what came of it.

If I made it through to my January doctor’s appointment (not my preference—I really didn’t want to be sick over the holidays) I’d see what he’d say about it.

In the meantime, I’m trying to take care as best I know how. Staying hydrated, eating well, getting as much sleep as I can, though I rarely get the sleep I need during the work week. And that’s the blessing and curse of working from home. I can still work while I’m sick without exposing anyone else to what I’ve caught, but sinus infections aren’t contagious, per se.

There was work to be done, though, and so work I did.

I sought the advice of a pharmacist who recommended Cold FX. So, I tried that out. I thought the illen was too far advanced for it to help but combined with meds to reduce symptoms and the irrigation of the neti-pot, it seemed to help with sleeping through the night. I also added hot toddies in the evening (tea with honey and rum). I’m pulling out all the old home remedies and supports I can.

And…toward the end of the month, after some narsty nights plagued with coughing—more the result of stubborn snot clinging to my airways and turning my throat into some bizarre mucus air harp (wheeze, whistle, gurgle) than anything else—I finally managed to sleep through the night.

Things seemed to be turning the corner in a positive direction.

I’ve discovered that if I have anything other than work scheduled on a weekday evening, be it a critique group meeting, support group meeting, haircut, taking Torvi to get her nails ground—anything, I’m out of spoons for the day.

I’m trying to respect my energy levels, day to day, and I’m learning that my executive function and support needs also vary daily. What I was once able to do easily, I may now struggle with. It’s a difficult lesson to learn.

Thank…whatever, I have some time off over the holidays.

The month in writing

Getting back into writing mode is an iffy proposition. I worked on some edits for a short story early in the month and that seemed to go well.

I wrote a poem. Not sure of its quality, but it felt good in the writing.

But when it came to Reality Bomb, the going was tough. I got back to it on the 9th but managed maybe half a page. Still, I touched it!

The next day, I had an appointment after work and my Dispatches meeting, so I wasn’t able to get to RB.

I did a little more work on it the next evening, but the following two days were challenging at work, and I had no energy to speak of in the evenings. I also had a sneezing fit (one every 10 to 15 seconds for about a half hour) the first night and that took all the fight out of me. The second night it was coughing fits over the course of an hour, which aggravated my GERD. I’m sure both helped to usher out infection (it’s what they do, after all) but both were exhausting and not conducive to trying to write (or do anything else).

But I finally finished rewriting the troublesome chapter I started working on last month and moved on with my re-read. I finished that in a couple of evenings, with minor touch-ups.

When I got back to the drafting of the final two chapters, though, I stalled again, but just for a couple of days while I was focusing on recovery, finishing up the Christmassing, and doing some associated running around.

The going was slow, but I got back to it.

Along with preparing my application to the Banff Centre for Arts & Creativity SFF Program, and some grant applications.

Something I neglected to mention last month was that an old friend of Siobhan Riddell reached out to me and offered to send me one of the sketches she’d done for him. I couldn’t justify accepting one of his remembrances, but I did accept a couple of pictures. They’re lovely.

This has happened periodically over the years, and it gives me all the feels to know that Siobhan’s wondrous work has touched other people as deeply (or deeper, frankly) as it’s touched me.

Then, I received some news about Through the Portal. Apparently, their website was down, but it’s back up and running again.

And they are planning two in-person events for the anthology, both in Toronto. One was on December 28th and the other in February 2025. I can’t participate in either, so I’ve been kept out of the loop on the publicity.

I received an opportunity mid-month to submit my work to the poetry in Canada poetry bookshelf. I’ll let you know when The Art of Floating makes its appearance.

There was an SF Canada board meeting on the 3rd to prepare for the upcoming AGM. It was an efficient meeting, and all the necessary decisions and arrangements were made.

The AGM itself was scheduled for the 28th. There were a few technical issues and delays, but everything worked out in the end.

The year in review

This has been a momentous year for me in terms of writing. My debut poetry collection! All the promo and signings and reviews and events around that! More poetry publications! A cli-fi short story publication! Another acceptance of a poem and a short story for future publication!

Given that I’ve been in burnout since September, that’s not bad!

In terms of words written or revised in the year, I:

  • wrote only 1,553 words of short fiction and revised 187 (that I tracked),
  • wrote 3,232 words of creative non-fiction,
  • wrote 28 new poems, and
  • wrote 39,059 words in this blog/newsletter.

I stopped tracking my revision efforts on Reality Bomb partway through the year. It was getting complicated. But if things progress as they have been, I should finish with a 120k-word draft. I’d wanted to bring it down more than that, but I still have a listening pass to go, and hope to find a few more places to trim then.

In writing-related events, my ongoing, though stalled, work with Suzy Vadori, and the Stillwater Writing Retreat are highlights.

In retrospect, though I took my six-week, self-funded leave as a means to recover from the flurry of activity around the launch of The Art of Floating, I now recognize that I was probably anticipating burnout even then. I could not have anticipated the accidents and illnesses of either my mom or my mom-in-law, but I could probably feel the impending exhaustion.

I’m grateful I took the leave and that my employer offers the work arrangement, but it means that I won’t be able to take another until the latter part of 2025.

At work, I was able to accept an acting position as an instructional designer on a new team, and though the transition has been a bit fraught, things are finally coming together on the one major project.

In terms of reading, I set myself the goal of reading 50 books this year. In fact, I’ve read or listened to 93 books, 186% of my goal. Admittedly, reading several poetry collections, a fair amount of short non-fiction, and listening to audiobooks helped to increase the number of books I read this year, I still outpaced my goal by quite a bit. And I’ve read a bunch of books that I wouldn’t normally.

Filling the well

The new Reed moon in Sagittarius was on December 1st.

The full moon in Gemini was on the 15th.

Winter solstice fell on the 21st. Did my altar thing.

And the new Elder moon in Capricorn was on the 30th. I know the second full moon in a month is referred to as a “blue” moon, but I had no idea that the second new moon in a month is called a “black” moon. It’s not official astronomy terminology, but that’s what’s out there on the interwebz.

I had no writerly events this month, to my great relief. I needed the relax and to focus on getting my words back.

I did meet for a final time this year with my Dispatches critique group on the 10th. It was a relaxed evening.

I had a massage on the 4th. Bliss.

My support group met on the 18th. This month’s topic was shame. And hoo-boy is this a big issue for me.

And I finished the month with some well-earned and desperately needed annual leave. I was off from the 21st through to January 1st, 12 days off for the price of 5.

My bestie and her partner came up for a visit on the 28th. Phil made cookies and apple cake. They went home with the remainders.

What I’m watching and reading

I watched the fourth and final season of Superman & Lois (CTV SciFi). Yeah, they did the death of Superman. Last season, Lex Luthor turned Bizarro into Doomsday by injecting him with a serum that resurrects him and then killing him repeatedly (I know, I know). Doomsday kills Superman in front of his family, ripping out his heart. Jordan gets him to the Fortress and into suspended animation, but he can’t heal without a heart. So, General Lane sacrifices himself after injecting himself with the serum that resurrected Bizarro so that Lois and the boys can use it to heal Clark. But having a human heart is enough to make Clark age and slowly de-power.

Yadda, yadda, yadda. Final showdown with Doomsday (again) and Lex in John Henry’s suped-up suit. Superman saves the day. In the aftermath, Lex goes to jail for good, several couples are united, Jon (who developed powers) and Jordan get married and have a passel of kids. Lois’s cancer returns, she dies, and then Clark’s human heart gives out. Clark and Lois are reunited in the afterlife.

Having said that (and rather snarkily), S&L was one of the best series to emerge from the “Arrowverse” (even though it was supposed to be in a separate timeline). All the other series got old after a few seasons of retreading the same ground, although most were entertaining, initially.

Charlie Jane Anders has an interesting take on why the Arrowverse, as a whole, was the best set of superhero series on TV. I don’t know if I agree with her, but she says that superhero stories, having come from the comics, are inherently episodic and focused not on superheroic antics, but on the emotional entanglements and journeys of the characters. They’re soap operas. I see her point, but I was never fond of soap operas. Maybe that’s why the various Arrowverse series got old for me, real fast, and why S&L, at only four seasons, comes out ahead of the pack.

Then, I watched the first season of Time Bandits (Apple TV +). I watched the original Terry Gilliam movie so long ago that I don’t really remember it, but I enjoyed this new adaptation. History nerd Kevin is bullied, and his family doesn’t understand him. When the self-proclaimed Time Bandits enter his room through a portal in his closet, pursued by the Supreme Being (who wants his map back, thankyouverymuch), Kevin is swept away into time travelling adventure, while the bandits try to steal treasures from everywhen they visit. Fun.

Next, I finished Black Cake (Disney +) based on Charmaine Wilkerson’s novel of the same name. Byron and Benedetta (B&B) are estranged but come together when their mother dies of cancer. In a series of pre-recorded statements, the siblings learn that their mother, who they knew as Eleanor, was actually Coventina. As they slowly learn the truth, they begin to work through their own secrets and trauma. I enjoyed it (especially Nine Night and duppies), and I have the ebook, which I’ll now have to read 🙂

The series ended on a cliffhanger as B&B’s recently revealed half-sister begins to listen to her separately-recorded message from Eleanor/Coventina, but Hulu cancelled it, so the book may be the only place I can find out what happens next (!)

I also finished watching the latest season of Only Murders in the Building (Disney +). The gang is excited because an OMitB movie is being made, but it’s not long before they figure out that Sazz, whose murder was revealed in the last moments of last season, is missing. When they find one of her prosthetics in the apartment’s incinerator, they have their next season of the podcast. Charles’ serial killer ex escapes prison, Oliver and Loretta navigate their long-distance relationship, and poor Mabel ends up squatting in a dead guy’s apartment. And, of course, another murder was revealed in the last minutes of the season. Fun, as always.

Then, I watched The Lost City when it was shown on the CTV Scifi channel. It’s been on my list of fun movies to watch for a while, but I haven’t been able to find it on any of the streaming services. I guess it will be on Crave now, but I was happy to have a relaxing evening of enjoyable and undemanding viewing. Sandra Bullock stars as Loretta Sage, a former archeological researcher and reclusive romance author on a book tour with her cover model Alan played by Channing Tatum. When she’s abducted, Alan ropes in former Navy SEAL and CIA operative Jack Trainer (Brad Pitt) to help him rescue Loretta.

Phil and I watched the Doctor Who Christmas special, Joy to the World (Disney +). It was a lovely, sentimental story, and I loved the idea of the time hotel, but the story could have used more Joy in it 🙂 The character was a bit sidelined in the story, but I guess you only have so much runtime to fill, and you have to make cuts somewhere. Watch it and see what you think.

Finally, Phil and I finished watching the third season of Bleach: The 1,000-Year Blood War (Disney +). Yhwach tricks Ichigo into killing the Soul King, though one of the soul reapers sacrifices himself to become the Soul King’s right hand. Various factions of the soul reapers fight various members of the Stern Ritter. At the end, Uryu’s plan to infiltrate the Stern Ritters and stop Yhwach is revealed. He stays to fight Haschwalth, who is endowed with Yhwach’s Almighty while Yhwach sleeps, and sends Ichigo to kill the sleeping Yhwach. One more season to complete the story arc!

My first listen of the month was the Audible Original Goblin Hero, the second in Jim C. Hines’ Goblin Trilogy. The reputation of “Jig the Dragonslayer” draws a desperate ogre to the goblin caves. Pixies have taken over the ogres, literally, and they need Jig’s help. The goblin leader is all for it, wanting to rid herself of Jig and all the goblins who want him to be leader instead of her. And Jig’s not too sad to go, either. Vika, obsessed with the hero’s journey, has been bothering Jig to teach her magic, but he doesn’t know how.

Things get interesting when Vika decides to embark on her own hero’s journey and follows Jig into the heart of rainbow-coloured, mind-controlling, pixie madness. Fun!

Then, I read Legacy, the second in Lois McMaster Bujold’s The Sharing Knife series. Dag and Fawn return to his home, uneasy with their anticipated reception. Dag warned her that it would be more difficult than sorting things out with her family, but Fawn doesn’t realize how hostile the Lakewalkers are until Dag’s brother Dar refuses to recognize their marriage and insists that Dag turn around and deliver Fawn back into the uncaring arms of her family. Things get complicated when Dag has to lead a rescue mission to a northern town overrun by a Malice and it’s mudmen and mind slaves, leaving Fawn to face the hostility of the Lakewalkers alone. Very good.

Next, I read The Heart Forger, the second book in Rin Chupeco’s The Bone Witch series. It’s the continuing story of Tea, The Bone Witch. Each chapter continues Tea’s past adventures as she relates them to the bard she initially compelled to tell her tale and jumps into the present as the bard witnesses what she does as a result of all she learned. A complex plot and intertwined characters. I loved it.

Then, I finished my reread of C.S. Lewis’ The Magician’s Nephew. There was a time when I used to read the entire Chronicles of Narnia about once a year, sitting at my desk in the evenings, but it’s been decades since I thought to pick up some of my childhood favourites. As good as I remembered it.

I also read The Shadow Glass by Rin Chupeco, the third book in The Bone Witch series. There seemed to be some issues with bringing the story full circle with the dual timelines and some critical events/information were glossed over toward the end, relying on revelations from the beginning of book one and narrative summaries from earlier in the book to fill in the gaps. It was a bit disorienting, but the author ultimately stuck the landing with a bittersweet ending that was worth it.

I read Kelley Armstrong’s Tales of the Otherworld. This collection so shorter tales focuses more on the Cabal than on the werewolves, but vampires make a couple of appearances, and we get the backstory of how Elena and Clay met and fell in love.

Next, I finished That Hideous Strength, the third in C.S. Lewis’ Space Trilogy. Having read the full trilogy now, I’d say they’re more in the way of science fantasy than science fiction.

Unlike the first two books, which focus of the adventures of Ransom as he travels first to Mars and then to Venus to fight the evil spirits of the universe, this novel begins with the tale of Mark and Jane Studdock, as Mark, a sociologist and academic, is seduced into the ranks of the NICE. Jane, lonely and rudderless as she tries to orient herself to married life when her husband is so often absent, begins to have visions, which draw her into the community of St. Anne’s.

NICE aims, through eugenics and fascism, to control humanity. Weston, Ransom’s antagonist in the last two novels, is mentioned as a martyr to their cause and other of Weston’s co-conspirators from the first novel have been given new names as they seek to corrupt the social and intellectual foundations of Britain. At St. Anne’s, Jane meets the director, who is, in fact, Ransom, and who has an odd affinity for animals. In a final battle for free will and humanity, Ransom’s people find Merlinus Ambrosius, whom NICE operatives are also seeking. Merlin is sent into the NICE stronghold to disrupt their plans, free their prisoners and animals, on whom they experiment, and lead the internal revolt.

Perelandra, or Venus, comes to take Ransom to his heavenly reward, Mark is freed from the machinations of NICE, and Jane welcomes her wayward husband home. The characters are mostly passive, with the exception of Merlin, but even he is counselled not to murder anyone, but to let them be hoist by their own petards. Not for everyone, but enjoyable.

And that was the month in this writer’s life.

Until next month, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!

The next chapter: A month in the writerly life https://melaniemarttila.ca

The next chapter: June 2024 update

/ Melanie Marttila

I just may be more burnt out than I thought I was.

Picture of a cloud-speckled evening sky above trees.

Life in general

Though I knew I needed to rest during my six-week leave with income averaging (LIA), I thought it would only take a few days and then I’d be ready to hit the ground running with some planned activities.

I was hoping to:

  • Recover my garden from two years of neglect and three of minimal effort before that.
  • Paint the outside door (to match the other that has been painted for, like seven years now?).
  • Give the house a thorough cleaning.
  • Rearrange my office.

But the most I was able to accomplish in May was to repot some plants and get my bird feeders and bird bath set up. I bought the paint for the door, but never got around to the repainting.

Also, I was still seeing signs that I was dysregulated. Stumbling around and bumping into things; forgetting that I had something in my hands (like a freshly-emptied incense holder) and carrying it with my into another room only to realize I had it in my hand, putting it back, and forgetting why I was walking into another room; forgetting my meds; forgetting components of my rituals. And the list goes on.

As a result, I thought I’d let my recovery process guide me until after the Stillwater Writing Retreat (see below) on the second weekend of June. The retreat itself would be a bit of a reset with minimal/no access to social media, streaming, and my favourite time-waster game.

No revenge procrastination (though there’s no longer anything to revenge?) for two days. I was hoping that might help to reset my internal clock.

Since the onset of my LIA, I’d been routinely staying up until 1:30 or 2 am and sleeping in to compensate the next day. In June, that naturally started to sort itself out and I was getting to bed at midnight or 12:30 am.

I did get to bed earlier at the retreat, but it was only two days and as soon as I was back home, established habits took hold. I slowly came to the realization that I may not get many (or any) of my big goals completed during this leave.

And then a heatwave arrived. In a house with no central air, it was a miserable few days.

Just focused on recovery. And revision/writing.

But … I seem to have recovered from my sinusitis (at last). The third course of antibiotics was finished the day I left for the Stillwater Retreat. And I decided to discontinue both the antihistamines and the neti pot while I was away. I would have been too much to manage while travelling.

I resumed the neti pot when I returned but stopped it again after another week. I never got used to the sensory ick of it. Yes, it was effective in clearing out my sinuses, but my eyes watered, I drooled (!), and I sneezed multiple times during each session. Even if the water was cool, the saline solution felt like it was burning my nasal passages. Thoroughly unpleasant.

I am keeping the neti pot and remaining saline solution sachets as well as the remaining month of antihistamines in case the seasonal allergies return in the fall. A few days of discomfort is worth fending off another bout of sinusitis.

And I have a follow up appointment with my doctor on July 2nd. We’ll see what he says.

The month in writing

The month was devoted to continuing revisions/rewriting of the third act of Reality Bomb, as well as the work I committed to when I enrolled in Ariel Gordon’s workshop.

A gentle reminder that I’ve stopped sharing screenshots of my Excel writing and revision tracker because I’ve stopped setting goals in it. It’s purely the tracking of the writing and revision I accomplish within the given months and year. And I’m not tracking RB at all. At this point there’s more rewriting going on with that project than straight revision, and it’s had to compare previous drafts with this one, particularly when I’m combining bits of what were separate chapters in the last draft and then shifting bits around so that none of it even vaguely resembles what went before.

It’s actually made writing and revision easier. I don’t feel the pressure of not meeting a particular goal. I used to revise my goals multiple times a year because I wasn’t “up to par,” which is ridiculous. I’m feeling better about my writing and revision progress now. I’m flowing with highs and lows of my energy. I do what I can, when I can, with the energy I have, and it is enough. So am I 🙂

June 6th was a good news day. First, my poem, “Vasilisa,” was published in Polar Borealis 30.

The cover of Polar Borealis 30 featuring artwork by Derek Newman-Stille.

Then, I received an email that work was proceeding on the anthology that one of my stories was accepted for last year (!). I can’t talk about it now, but I’ll share what I can, when I can.

On the 13th, I received an email from a reader telling me how much they appreciated “The Art of Floating.” It warms an author’s heart to know that they’ve touched someone with their words.

On the 14th, The Temz Review released this thoughtful and thorough review of The Art of Floating. It gave me all the feels. But mostly gratitude.

Then, of the 15th, Trish Talks Books posted this lovely review on Instagram.

On the 18th, I received the notification that my reading fee and travel reimbursement for the Conspiracy of 3 reading last month would be deposited by the end of the week.

I only had one meeting with Suzy this month because I had to work around the Stillwater Retreat (see below). We met on the 20th. It was a good meeting. I’m still getting many of the same comments, but I’m anticipating them now, and I have a better idea of the revision I need to complete after each session. We’re moving on to the climax. The end is in sight. Exciting!

On the 21st, I received notification that I have been accepted as an Access Copyright Affiliate.

And then, on the 28th, The Wordstock Sudbury literary festival announced its lineup for this year’s festival, including me (!), Kim Fahner, Ariel Gordon, Danielle Daniel, Drew Hayden Taylor, Hollay Ghadery, and more! So honoured to be included in this stellar 11th edition of Wordstock! Here is the article by Heidi Ulrichsen for Sudbury.com, and the Sudbury Star’s coverage.

Press release image for the 11th edition of the Wordstock Sudbury Literary Festival.

In the area of the business of writing, the League of Canadian Poets (LCP) town hall was on the 18th and their AGM was on the 25th.

In between, on the 23rd was the an SF Canada Board meeting.

And the Canadian Authors Association AGM was on the 29th.

I am definitely AGM’d out!

Filling the well

The new Hawthorn moon in Gemini was on the 6th. It was not only overcast but raining as well.

The summer solstice was on the 20th this year. The heatwave we’d been suffering through all week finally broke. It was still hot, but overcast (surprise, surprise!). I lit my altar and followed a guided meditation.

And the full Strawberry moon in Capricorn was on the 21st. Another overcast day.

A picture of the waxing moon among dynamic clouds.

My intention was to keep my learning light this month and I think I managed it, despite myself.

I registered for the virtual Nebula conference and awards weekend from June 6 to 8, but then (and this is just one of the many symptoms of my ongoing dysregulation) I signed up for Lauren Carter’s Stillwater Retreat from June 7 to 9. Fortunately, I was able to catch the virtual sessions in replay.

ICYMI, here was my post about the Stillwater Retreat.

The second session of Ariel Gordon’s Dispatches from the World workshop was on the 11th and the third and final session was on the 25th. I wrote 2 poems for the 11th, which I revised into 1, and then I wrote and revised a creative non-fiction piece for the 25th. 

The next Free Expressions webinar I signed up for was Fate vs. Destiny with Donald Maass on the 13th. Interesting and thought-provoking, as usual.

And on the 17th, I virtually attended Imagining the Future We Want to Live In at the Sudbury Indie Cinema. I had intended to go in person but, at the last minute, I noticed that the event would be livecast on Facebook, and I attended that way. Minding my spoons 🙂

The Locus Awards weekend started on the 19th and went through until the 22nd. I caught several readings and the awards ceremony on zoom or Youtube and hope to catch the rest on replay.

Finally, I registered for a webinar on “Writing and Pitching your Hybrid Memoir” with Courtney Maum (!) through Jane Friedman on the 26th. I wasn’t back from walking Torvi in time, so I watched the replay when it was released. As I continue to toy with the idea of a hybrid memoir, this course was invaluable.

In personal care, I had a support group meeting on the 12th. The topic was emotional regulation, and it was a good session, though the last until September.

I took Torvi for a Furminator groom on the 21st. This was her second with the happy hoodie. She’s still stressed but I like to think the happy hoodie helped.

On the 27th, my mom’s sister and her daughter came to visit. Phil made a lovely bruschetta and salad, and Mom cooked a frittata. We hadn’t seen each other is years, and it was nice.

A white Finn rose in bloom.

What I’m watching and reading

I watched the first season of Hazbin Hotel (Amazon). Charlie Morningstar, daughter of Lucifer and Lilith, has opened the titular hotel in hell with an eye to rehabilitating sinners and getting them into heaven. At the same time Adam (yes, that Adam) and his inquisitors (essentially Valkyries) are increasing the frequency of their culls (read massacres) of hell’s denizens from annually to every six months. Every episode features several musical numbers, so be aware of that, or skip if that’s not your jam, but the performances are quite good. Intended for adults.

Then, I finished watching The Second-Best Hospital in the Galaxy (Amazon), about two alien doctors, Klak and Sleech, who incite all kinds of medical and relationship hijinks while trying to protect the secret of a parasitic lifeform that eats its host’s anxiety…until it departs explosively, killing the host. Very fun, very adult.

Next, I watched Chevalier (Disney +). The movie focuses on Joseph de Boulogne’s attempt to run the Paris Opera House, a position that was chosen by a royal counsel. Though he was an accomplished composer, because he was the son of a slave woman, Boulogne was prevented from taking the position. The end of the movie predicts the next phase of his life in which he fought on the side of the Revolution. Very good.

Phil and I watched the most recent season/series of Doctor Who (Disney +) with Ncuti Gatwa. Phil wasn’t that enamoured, but I enjoyed it overall. There was a little unevenness in the season, but it came together in the end.

And I finished watching the final season of The Crown (Netflix). It focused on the events leading up to Diana’s death through to the marriage of Charles and Camilla. Overall, I think the series was an interesting interpretation of Queen Elizabeth II’s reign, though they declined to carry the story through to her death, which may have been a more complete rendering of events. I’m sure they wondered how to address the later scandals of the Royal Family and how to make the last years of Elizabeth’s reign dynamic as health concerns kept both her and Phillip more and more secluded until their respective deaths.

I watched the second season of Fraggle Rock: Back to the Rock (Apple TV). Yes, this is a kids’ show, but it’s rich with nostalgia for me. This season focused on the gardening crisis of the gorgs obsession with strawberries and use of chemicals to increase the size of their yield, leading to the disappearance of the radishes and the depletion of the soil. Meanwhile the human doctoral student is trying to perfect her floating wind turbine design. And yes, the series is a little heavy-handed on the moral lesson side, and events can seem either contrived or completely random, but everything comes together at the end. This won’t be everyone’s cuppa, but I love me some Muppets.

I also watched Iwájú (Disney +). It was a lovely fable set in a future Lagos. Tole is a child whose father is a busy inventor. He cannot spend time with her because of work pressures, though his primary goal is to create a robot lizard to protect Tole because children have been disappearing in nearby Lagos. Sadly, the robot isn’t working properly.

Tole and her friend Cole decide to take a trip to Lagos, Tole with the goal of proving to her father that she is a big girl, and Cole with the goal of turning Tole over to the man who’s been abducting children in order to secure care for his sick mother. Because this is a kids’ show, all works out in the end. It was an enjoyable, if short, series.

Finally, I watched Interview with the Vampire, Part II (AMC). Sadly, I missed the first season and since AMC wants viewers to subscribe to AMC + to see it, I missed out. But I now understand why everyone is raving about this series. It’s really good.

A note on the month in reading before I get to the books. Had intended to make time to continue reading my print and ebooks during my leave but ultimately did not. My recovery took precedence. So, all of these books are audiobooks.

My first read of the month was Tomorrow’s Kin, the first novel in Nancy Kress’s Yesterday’s Kin series. I read this series out of order and my head didn’t explode 🙂 In this novel, we’re introduced to Maryanne Jenner, her three children, and the complicated series of events around the Worlders first visit to Earth. But that’s all over by the midpoint of the book, when Noah departs with the World ship. The rest of the novel addresses the fallout of the spore cloud and its effects on the ecosystem (it kills almost all mice and so disrupts prey and predator populations as well as agriculture and the economy, also, Russian and east Asian populations prove not to be immune, also, also, it alters the genome of fetuses making a generation of super-hearer kids, of whom Colin, one of Maryanne’s grandchildren, is one). This novel focuses on the science and the billionaires competing to build the first starship based on the plans the Worlders left behind. Like I said last month, an interesting series.

Then, I read The Men of the Otherworld, by Kelley Armstrong. This collection of linked short stories focuses on Clay and Jeremy. It was nice to get some backstory and context for the werewolf men.

Next, I read Oathbreakers, the second in the Vows and Honor series by Mercedes Lackey. Tarma and Kethry, still intent on earning enough money to open their own schools of battle and wizardry, respectively, join a mercenary company. When their leader disappears, they depart to investigate and enter a world of regal intrigue. There’s still one more book in the series, so I anticipate there will be more adventures in store.

I read Long Hot Summoning by Tanya Huff. It’s the third in her Keeper series (another disordered read—what’s going on?). Diana has graduated high school and finally come into her power as a Keeper. Her first summons? A mall in Kingston in the process of succumbing to the other side. And hell is trying to get a foothold in the real world. Her older sister, Clair, is away on a summoning of her own and Diana dived in, eager to prove herself. Entertaining.

Then, I took a brief break from fiction with The History and Enduring Popularity of Astrology by Katherine Walker. It’s a The Great Courses course converted into an Audible Original. Interesting insight into an art I’ve always dabbled in.

Next, I read Rollback by Robert J. Sawyer. Dr. Sarah Halifax, a preeminent SETI researcher, is in her eighties when the response to a message she sent to an alien civilization arrives. A billionaire benefactor steps in, offering Sarah the titular procedure, which will reset her body to its biological age when she was 25 and enable her to remain alive long enough to continue the conversation with the aliens, the one-way transmission of which takes 18 years. She agrees, her only condition that her husband Don receives the treatment as well. In a cruel twist, the procedure works on Don but not on Sarah. She must duplicate the decoding miracle that she accomplished nearly forty years ago, while Don comes to terms with his restored youth and the inevitability of losing the love of his life.

I listened to Habits for Good Sleep by Timothy J. Sharp, an Audible Original. Nothing new or startling, but a lot of good advice that I could stand to hear again.

My last read/listen of the month was another classic, Jules Verne’s 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. This novel seemed to be a response to Melville’s Moby Dick, starting with the narrator, a French naturalist, his servant, and a Canadian harpooner boarding The Lincoln in search of a mysterious sea monster, responsible for the sinking of several ships.

The sea monster comes for The Lincoln, and the narrator and his two companions are thrown overboard, only to be brought on board The Nautilus (AKA the sea monster) by Captain Nemo. From there, Nemo declares that they may never leave his ship, and they embark on the titular adventure. The novel shares many of the conceits with Melville’s, including long digressions into the nature and function of The Nautilus, the various sea life the narrator documents in his travels, the occasional people they meet (Nemo is a misanthrope), and the details of their navigational journey. It was okay.

And that was the month in this writer’s life.

Until next month, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!

The next chapter: a month in the writerly life. melaniemarttila.ca

The next chapter: May 2024 update

/ Melanie Marttila

Every month is poetry month. For now, at least.

Picture of the waxing moon above trees.

Life in general

The sinusitis hasn’t relented. On the 5th, my right ear was completely blocked, and I was half-deaf. I literally could hear nothing out of my right ear. It was the weirdest thing. On the afternoon of the 6th, something popped, and I could hear again, but another night of steam treatment and restless sleep, the ear was clogged up again. At lunch on the 7th, the ear opened up again, but by then, I was beyond the 15 days the second antibiotic was supposed to stay in my system.

Wednesday was, once again, clinic day. This time, the doctor figured the infection had been cleared up (after the two courses of antibiotics) and that it was just inflammation resulting from the prolonged infection that was the issue. I left with a prescription for antihistamines and recommendations to begin using a neti pot, mineral oil in my ear to help clear up the blockage, and to make an appointment with my doctor in two weeks in the event that the new course of treatment didn’t take hold.

Fortunately, my doctor’s office is next door to my pharmacy and while I was waiting for my prescription to be filled, I went up to the receptionist’s desk and asked if there were any openings in two weeks. There was exactly one availability. I took it. More on the results of that appointment, below.

Phil got the tires changed and a tune up for the car in advance of my trip to North Bay (see below). We had to get new summer tires, the ones that came with the car having worn to the nubs. In the past few years, we’ve had issues with air leakages. We should be good for another few years, now.

At work, I’m moving toward another deadline in the project I’ve been working on since spring 2022. Of the four courses in the curriculum I’ve been working on, one has been updated and posted to our learning management system, one is in the process of being re-written and won’t be ready for design, accessibility, or posting until later this year. Of the two courses I’m working on, one has been completely redesigned and the other has been updated. I’m in the process of finishing the accessibility (alt-text, long descriptions, etc.) on the redesigned course. A colleague has done most of the work on the other.

I didn’t finish the work before my six-week leave with income averaging (LIA) started, but guess what? The deadline isn’t hard this time! My colleagues can finish the work while I’m off.

Also, I received some great news. After two years of budget challenges, my division finally has some wiggle room for staffing. After I return from my leave, I’m going to have an acting instructional designer position with another design team for a year (!) It will be a nice bump to my pay (now reduced by my LIA) and a lovely break from the project that’s occupied me for so long. The final course for that project should be completed in my absence.

It also opens up the opportunity for other, younger colleagues to progress in their careers and make room for me to move back to my existing team as an instructional designer instead of a courseware developer next summer. Or to stay with my new team. We’ll see where the future takes me.

Spring has sprung and I’m enjoying the scents despite not being completely recovered.

The distinctively astringent smell of poplar sap has given way to the pollen, seeds, and general messiness. In past years, the pin cherry blossoms emerged on Victoria Day long weekend, followed a week later by the lilacs, and then the honeysuckles. This year, they’re all coming out at once. It’s glorious! And then the mountain ash blooms come out and muddle the lovely scents of spring with their odd, musty odour.

The bumble bees have been very active in the honeysuckle. I’ve even seen one crawling into a hole in the ground next to a paver driveway. Weird, the things you see when you pay attention 😉

Another pleasant discovery was that when I walked Torvi out on the boardwalk behind Moonglow toward Robinson Lake, the missing bridge has been replaced! This now expands our walking options.

The month in writing

The first part of May was dedicated to recovery, to be honest. I’m burning out, professionally, creatively, all of it. It’s why I wanted to take another leave with income averaging. It’s not that I haven’t been writing at all, but I’ve been focusing on commitments, stories for anthology calls and open submission periods, poems as I have the spoons.

But I returned to Reality Bomb on the 7th, in anticipation of resuming work with Suzy Vadori in what should be my final book coaching package.

On the 26th, I made my first of the last 6-submission package working with book coach Suzy. This should complete this revision of the novel (!) We met the following Thursday, May 30th. The session was very much the same old, same old. I still haven’t managed to master Suzy’s lessons despite working with her for the better part of a year and a half and participating in her developmental editing mentorship.

I’m trying to be kind to myself because we’re resuming work after two months of me focusing on The Art of Floating. It’s going to take me time to get back into the swing of things. I’m still feeling resistance. I am a slow cooker …

I attended the launch of my friend Emily De Angelis’ YA novel, The Stones of Burren Bay on May 5th, which was a beautiful, sunny day. The launch was at the Northern Water Sports Centre and was packed. So happy for Emily and her new book!

On the 8th, I was informed that “Cedar Waxwings” would be published in Commuter Lit on May 16. I had submitted the poem to their contest last month but didn’t place. It was a pleasant surprise.

On the 14th, I zipped over to North Bay after work for the Conspiracy of 3 reading series. You may have seen my post on Facebook and Instagram about it. In case you didn’t, it was a lovely evening.

First, Denis Stokes offered a brief reading from Alice Munro and we held a minute of silence to honor her passing. Then, Ric Desmuelles read from Pity the Minotaur. I read from The Art of Floating. And several lovely people shared their work in the open reading.

I got to catch up with old friends, not just Denis and Ric, but Natalie Wilson, Tim and Karin Robertson, and Barry and Jen Grills.

I brought seven copies of the collection with me, well, eight with the copy I read from, just in case, and ended up going home with only my reading copy (!)

This event conflicted with the launch of Sudbury Superstack: A Changing Skyline, in which I have a creative non-fiction piece, that took place the same night in Sudbury at the Steelworkers Hall. I was sad to miss it, but such is the life of a professional author.

But I was able to arrange to pick up my contributor copy, honorarium, and my new Sudbury Writers’ Guild bunny hug and the May SWG meeting at the end of the month.

Picture of the back of a Sudbury Writers' Guild forest green hoodie and the cover of Sudbury Superstack: A changing skyline.
The back of the hoodie (actually, a bunny-hug) showing the SWG logo and the Sudbury Superstack: A Changing Skyline anthology.

My interview with rob mclennan came out on his blog on May 18th. It was fun answering his 12 or 20 questions 🙂

In the realm of the business of writing, there were a trio of TWUC meetings around the AGM. On the 16th was the pre-AGM town hall. Then the AGM was on the 25th, followed by a post-AGM networking event.

And on the 28th, there was the quarterly board meeting for SF Canada.

Filling the well

Beltaine (I spell it the way I spell it, ok?) was May first. Unfortunately, I was in recovery and used all my spoons for the day, so I didn’t get my altar lit. Not on the 2nd, either. Managed it on the 3rd.

The new Willow moon in Taurus 🙂 was on the 7th. It was overcast, as usual.

On the 10th, the mass coronal ejection hit our atmosphere, and while we didn’t get more than pale wisps here in town (too much light pollution from the streetlights, etc.), we got to see the aurora borealis. It wasn’t bright enough to take pictures, but other friends in other parts of the Sudz were able to see a spectacular display. Just grateful to have seen something.

And I have seen the aurora before, so I wasn’t terribly disappointed. When I was still in my teens (can’t remember the exact year, honestly), Mom, Dad, and I went down to the Ontario Secondary School Teachers’ camp near Parry Sound with my cousin Margot and her family, and we got to see the aurora and a lovely display of the Milky Way.

The full Flower/Budding moon in Sagitarius was on the 23rd. I got to see the moon after it rose that night, but I’ve given up trying to take decent pictures at night.

Waning fingernail moon and two planets visible in the daytime sky.
Not related to the full or new moons, but this cool shot of the waning fingernail moon and two planets visible in the daytime sky.

The FOLD online concluded on May 1st. I had to watch several sessions in replay and returned to watch the live sessions that were added after the fact. But the FOLD remains one of the best conferences, online or live, that I’ve attended.

On the 9th, I attended the TWUC webinar featuring the Danuta Gleed finalists about “Constructing a Story Arc.” Kim Fu, Saeed Teebi, and Gillian Wigmore shared their experience construction short story arcs.

Later that same night, was Janice Hardy’s “How to write characters with agency” presented by Free Expressions. I watched the replay ‘cause spoons.

There was another Free Expressions webinar on the 16th with Donald Maass on “Advanced Voice.” Again, watched the replay.

And I signed up for a three-part poetry workshop with Ariel Gordon called “Dispatches from the World.” The first session was on the 28th. We did some freewriting that I hope to be able to use in another project and workshopped almost everyone’s submissions. I have another assignment for our next workshop on June 11th that’s due on June 3rd.

The last of the spring session Finnish classes was on the 6th. While I am learning a lot, the intermediate class was verra challenging.

In terms of health/mental health, I had my last (for now) session with my therapist. I figured I’d just need some extra support to get through the first few months of the year with the launch and work deadlines and trying to manage my energy level/executive functioning/mental health. Again, it was an amicable parting.

My support group met on the 22nd. The topic this month was meltdowns and shutdowns.

On the 23rd, I had two appointments. The first was the follow up with my doctor about my persistent sinusitis, mentioned above. I came away with the recommendation to continue with the antihistamines and neti pot, and another prescription for antibiotics. Back to the amoxicillin, but for two weeks this time. Though I was asked to make an appointment in a month, the earliest I could get on was July 2nd.

I have already seen some improvement. Not as many headaches or sore teeth, though both still occur. Not as many feverish times. And the persistent tickling/feeling there’s something in my sinus has abated. So, I seem to be heading in the right direction.

The second was an appointment with my RMT. It was good to get some self-care in after the hectic of the last month and a half.

And the BIG news this month is that I started a six-week LIA after the Victoria Day long weekend! I’m off until July 2nd!

What I’m watching and reading

I watched Palm Springs (Amazon). Interesting take on the Groundhog Day trope. Nyles has already be stuck in the time loop—for years?—by the time Sarah finds her way to a mysterious glowy cavern. They’re both revealed to have made terrible choices, both in the real world (Sarah) and within the time loop (Nyles). Though they both grow during their time in the loop, that’s not what breaks the “curse.” I won’t spoil it because it’s a worthwhile watch.

Then, I finished watching The Other Black Girl (Disney +), a thriller based on the novel by Alyssa Cole. An uncomfortable and surreal parable about internalized racism and the lengths some people are willing to go to change the system.

I finished watching Bodies (Netflix). This limited series was an interesting take on time travel and I’m sorry, but some spoilers are necessary to explain. In the future, an anomaly called “the mouth” allows time travel into the past. The antagonist uses it to create an empire that will eventually allow him to create the post-apocalyptic utopia/dystopia he now controls in the future. Another character is splintered when he is shot while attempting to foil the antagonist, and ends up in four different times, 1890, 1941, 2023, and 2053, the last mere days before he leaves. The story follows the investigations of Detective Inspector Alfred Hillinghead, Detective Sergeant Karl Weissman (Charles Whiteman), Detective Seargent Shahara Hassan, and Detective Constable Iris Maplewood as they discover the body in each of their times.

Next, Phil and I watched the second season of Extraordinary (Disney +). I’d watched the first season myself, but as I was watching the second season, Phil decided he liked it and binged the whole of the first season in a couple of days. We finished watching the second season together. At the end of the first season, Jizzlord (Rob), the amnesiac cat-shifter, went to the shop to get some milk and is recognized by his son and wife just after he and Jen decided to date. The main through line of season 2 is Jen’s conflict with Nora (Rob’s telepathic wife) over Rob while she embarks on a treatment program that should result in her developing her latent powers. It’s hilarious and I highly recommend.

I finished watching my one and only reality TV show, So You Think You Can Dance (network). With Paula Abdul accusing Nigel Lithgoe of sexual harassment and the death of Twitch, the show has undergone a slight format change. They decided to include what happens in the house where the contestants stay during the competition, so it’s like SYTYCD and The Real World had a baby. And the dance competitions are now focused on real world challenges, like making ads, being back up dancers, and the like. Not as thrilled with this iteration of the show, I must say.

Then, I watched the whole of Our Flag Means Death (Crave). A bit late to the game with this one, but I’m glad I decided to check it out. Queer pirate love conquers all. Loved! Watch it if you haven’t.

Will Trent (network) completed its second season on May 21st. I really like this series and the second season finally was a gut punch. I can’t say anything without spoiling the season and you really should watch it if you can.

On the same night, The Rookie (network) also had its season finally. Short because of the writers’ strike, but pretty solid. Ended on a cliffhanger with several familiar past villains on the run and/or gunning for Nolan. Some of the Rookie Feds team showed up as well.

I also caught up on Only Murders in the Building (Disney +). I have now watched all three seasons and I’m enjoying this cozy podcast murder show. In season 1, the crew investigated the murder of one of the Arconia’s residents who had history with Mabel. No sooner had that mystery been solved when the second occurred in the season 1 finale, and Mabel was under suspicion. In the third season, Oliver and Charles are distracted because Oliver is trying to direct his off, off (possibly several more offs) Broadway comeback and Charles is in the production. When the leading man is murdered on opening night (yes, in the Arconia), you’d think Oliver and Charles would jump back on the mystery-solving bandwagon, but Oliver’s trying to save his show by turning it into a musical and Charles is in another messy relationship, which leaves Mabel in the lurch. Season 3 ends with another murder in the Arconia, which will be solved in the fourth (and I think final) season.

Then, Phil and I watched The Dead Boys Detective Agency (Netflix). It has the flavour of Lockwood and Co., but the plot is delightfully inverted and twisted. It’s also set in Neil Gaiman’s Sandman universe. Two young ghosts, evading Death their assigned afterlives, set up the titular detective agency, solving the mysteries of other ghosts so they can move on. A psychic trying to evade her demonic ex joins them in Port Townsend, Washington, where all kinds of supernatural shenanigans ensue. Loved.

I finished watching the short season of Grey’s Anatomy (network). A new batch of interns and troubles for the whole team. Looks like almost everyone has been fired or is in danger of being fired at the end of the season finale. I keep watching, just ‘cause.

And, finally, I also finished watching the final season of Star Trek: Discovery (network). The series wasn’t cancelled until after filming wrapped, and they had to make some hasty last-minute changes to wrap things up. The season’s arc was about finding the Progenitors’ tech, a call-back to The Next Generation. Racing Burnham and the crew are Mol and Lok, who want to trade the tech to the Breen in return for their freedom.

The series finale was two hours and though satisfying in some respects, was disappointing in others. [SPOILERS!] For example, after finally activating the tech and being named its new guardian, Burnham decides that it’s too dangerous for any one person to control and sends it off into a black hole. This invalidates the whole season. The Federation brass, even Kovacs, who sent them on this “red directive” mission in the first place, agree. So, off she goes. I get it, but it was deeply unsatisfying. The revelation of Kovacs as Agent Daniels (a callback to Enterprise) was cool, I guess. It was nice to see the happy endings, but to have Burnham fly Discovery and Zora out to a predetermined point in the galaxy to wait for some mysterious contact with no human crew … strikes me a cruel. Hardly the send-off either the ship or the AI deserved. So, a mixed bag.

My first read of May was Catherynne Valente’s Space Opera. A has-been band is chosen (last on the list—the rest of the candidates are dead) to defend Earth in a pan-galactic music competition. A loss will result in the annihilation of the planet. No pressure. Info-dump central, a bit deus ex machina at the end, and the climax was rushed, but enjoyable just for Valente’s voice-y prose.

Then, I read Piers Anthony’s Wielding a Red Sword. It’s the fourth book in his incarnations of immortality series. It was okay. A lot of objectification of women. A prince of Gujarat with a stutter disguises himself and joins a travelling circus as an acrobat and mime called Mym. He falls in love with Orb, an Irish musician, but is precipitously recalled home when his brother, who was to become Raj, dies. His father forces his marriage to Rapture, a princess, but because of his ability to become a “controlled” berserker, Mym becomes the incarnation of Mars, the god of war. He is then tempted by Lilith/Lila and must defeat Satan. There is a dead princess he must save from hell, too. Like I say, there’s a LOT of objectification.

Next, I finished Ada Hoffmann’s The Infinite, the third in her Outside series. The cruel AI Gods have abandoned Jai and the Chaos Zone to the Keres, but Yasira Chien and the Seven discover that the Keres and Nemesis are one in the same. The Keres is the bigger stick the Gods use to keep humanity in line. Allies are gathered but they won’t be enough to save humanity, and Dr. Evianna Talirr returns to ask Yasira to make the ultimate sacrifice. A satisfying conclusion to a series that centres neurodiversity, trauma, and the healing power of found family.

I also read Cathrynne Valente’s The Refrigerator Monologues, a fabulous collection of connected vignettes about women superheroes or girlfriends of superheroes who all end up in hell (why hell? It’s never explained) after they’ve been killed or lost everything to advance the character arcs of the men in their lives. A lot of critique of DC superheroes (the fridging trope arose when the body of Green Lantern’s girlfriend was literally stuffed in his fridge by a nemesis) but great snarky fun.

Then, I finished The Better Part of Valor by Tanya Huff. It’s the second novel in her Confederation series, the first book of which I read last month. This time, Staff Sergeant Torin Kerr is separated from her team and sent on a top-secret reconnaissance mission. A big, yellow ship that reads as part organic has appeared out of nowhere and Torin finds herself contending with the civilian salvage officer who found it and wants dibs on the salvage, the Others, who also show up to investigate, and Big Yellow itself, which seems to have plans of its own. I’m really enjoying this series.

I followed this up with Nancy Kress’s If Tomorrow Comes, the second in her Yesterday’s Kin series (I have not yet read the first book—reading a series out of order, I know!). It’s part military SF, part first contact, and part disaster/thriller. Years ago, a ship came to Earth from World, a alien-transplanted human colony, to warn of a space-faring spore cloud that is deadly to humans. Now, Earth is sending a mission to World with a crew of scientists carrying the vaccine for the spore cloud and a team of rangers as military escort. Things go to hell pretty quickly.

World is not as technologically advanced as Earth and its people work hard to keep it that way, living in balance with the planet and its resources. They have not developed a vaccine and the ship was a gift left for them by the advanced species that transplanted them to World over a hundred thousand years ago. When another contingent from Earth arrives and bombs three of the four World cities and the other Earth ship, the survivors have to figure out how to synthesize the vaccine because the spore cloud is only weeks away. Fascinating worldbuilding. Well-developed, if derivative, characters.

Then, I read The Oathbound by Mercedes Lackey. Tarma is sword-sworn and bound to the goddess. Kethry is a sorceress of the white winds and the bearer of the sword Need, that directs her to women under dire threat. The two are bondmates, and Kethry has promised to help rebuild Tarma’s murdered clan. At first, the novel seems to be an unconnected string of adventures, but eventually, everything comes together in a final confrontation. Quite good.

Finally, I read Terran Tomorrow by Nancy Kress, the third in the Yesterday’s Kin trilogy. At the end of the last book (above) [SPOILERS!] a colony ship is recalled. There are no World survivors, but the ship is filled with the purple, naked, and smelly World-equivalents of mice who survived the spore cloud thanks to a virophage. The virophage is released on World and saves most of the population. So, a team of Earth and World humans return to Earth to find it devastated. Though Earth humans were mostly immune to the spore cloud virus, it combined with avian flu virus and wiped out most the people on Earth. There are now about 120 million humans world-wide and in America, two factions are fighting for supremacy, the remnants of the US military, and New America. And then, people affected by the virophage and infected with the mutated r. sporae avovirus (RSA—how prophetic was that?) fall into comas. More science and military hijinx. Interesting series. And now I’m reading the first book in the series to find out how it all started (!)

And that was the month in this writer’s life.

Until next month, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!

The next chapter: a month in the writerly life. melaniemarttila.ca

The next chapter: April 2024 update

/ Melanie Marttila

National Poetry Month (NPM), a debut poetry collection launch, book signing, interviews, etc. mean a busy month for this writer with a day job.

A picture of the almost-full moon above budding tree branches.

Life in general

The illen turned out to be another case of sinusitis. Yay, a new weak spot in my immune system (!)

This marks the third time that I’ve contracted this particular infection. Last spring, I had thought I had developed seasonal allergies in mid-life, allergies that were exacerbated by the ubiquitous smoke of forest fires from late spring into early summer.

The reason I thought this was because the congestion lasted for months without developing into a serious cold/flu. I was up to date on all my vaccinations. Just to be safe, I tested for covid. The test came back negative.

Then, in late September 2023, I got sick again, and it felt exactly like what I’d had in the spring. This time, it developed into a nasty cough, persistent headaches, and pain in my sinuses. I tested for covid again and the test was negative. I went to the walk-in clinic because I wouldn’t be able to see my doctor in person for at least a month. I came away with antibiotics and a corticosteroid nasal spray. Still, it lasted for two months before it finally went away.

It was only after the fact, when I could smell and taste properly again, that I realized that it was probably the same infection spring and fall, and that it had just gone “sub-clinical” for the summer months. I’d had the taste of infection in the back of my throat the whole time.

This time, I’ve had sinusitis since the second week of March and have been to the walk-in clinic twice. I couldn’t test for covid, because all our kits had expired. I knew what I was dealing with, though, and am pretty sure the test would have returned a negative result.

The first time I went to the clinic, I was sent away with the same prescription as in the fall. I finished the course of treatment and did not feel any better. I returned to the clinic and was given a second, stronger prescription of antibiotics and advised to add steaming to my recovery regimen.

The fact that I’ve been working toward a deadline at work and toward the launch of my debut poetry collection all along has no doubt prolonged my recovery. In particular, the launch, signing, and the few live or online interviews I’ve done have made it necessary for me to mask at a level I’ve not had to since the start of the pandemic. All my energy goes toward that rather than toward my recovery.

Add to that the fact that there is not a lot of blood supply to the sinuses and antibiotics are not efficiently delivered to the source of the infection. On my second visit, the doctor I saw said the infection might be in the bone and even more difficult to eradicate.

Fortunately, by the end of the month, the second course of antibiotics appeared to be having an effect. It apparently stays in your system for about 15 days after the last dose.

The month in writing

Because I was focusing on The Art of Floating launch and all the associated writerly activities, I was less focused on writing and revision, but I still had a short story to finish, one to edit, and some poetry to submit.

Through the fabulous Melissa Yuan Innes (Yi), I managed to arrange for an interview with Derek Newman-Stille about TAoF on April 2nd! Yes, I was on Speculating Canada, the multi-Aurora Award-winning podcast.

Of course, on the 6th my day was devoted to the TAoF launch! You may have seen my brief post about it on the 7th. I tried to treat the day as normally as possible. With the exception of heading out to get my makeup done by Dana Lajeunesse of Fabulous After Forty 🙂 , I walked my dog, visited my mom, and tried to remain calm.

The launch went well, but afterward, on the way home from the event, in fact, my sinusitis rebounded. I could feel the congestion socking in again.

I applied for the Public Lending Right (PLR) program for both the print and ebook version of TAoF.

I now have Amazon (still being reviewed) and Goodreads Author pages (!) Eep! This is all so official!

I submitted my final reports for funding on the 10th and received my reading fee from the League of Canadian Poets (LCP) on the 25th. I’d received my cheque from The Writers’ Union of Canada (TWUC) in the mail the day before and deposited it on the 26th. I have not yet been invoiced by Place des Arts.

I submitted my answers for an interview in periodicities. It should be appearing May 18th or later.

Pulp Literature once again shared the news of my launch in their newsletter.

My recommended reading post went live on the 49th Shelf on the 11th! And not long after, my Open Book piece was also posted! I’ve been working on these pieces over the past months. It’s wonderful to see how they’ve come together!

On the 13th, I had a book signing at the Sudbury Chapters from 11 am to 2 pm. I signed nine books. Well, I actually signed 20, but nine of them were for the lovely people who bought them. The rest will be on the local authors shelf.

Picture of Melanie Marttila and publisher Heather Campbell at Chapters Sudbury.

I submitted a poem to a contest but did not place.

I recorded myself reading two more poems from my collection for a Poetry Pause promotion through River Street Writers. The reel was posted to Instagram on April 18th.

I finished rewriting my short story for an anthology call and submitted it on the 21st.

My interview with Heidi Ulrichsen for Sudbury.com came out on the 23rd. Since the social medias are angry with Canadian news, I can only share it with you here (!) The Art of Floating: Poetry book dedicated to Sudburian’s father.

Then, my piece for All Lit Up: There’s a poem for that came out on the 25th!

I also started my application for Access Copyright affiliation. There are a few things to get together. And I can only apply for work published in 2022 and before … ? Ah, well. I’ve started. Might as well finish.

And then, on the 29th, I was greeted with this amazing review of The Art of Floating by Sara Hailstone.

I revised another story for an open submission period and submitted it on the 30th.

And I wrote a bunch of poems 🙂

Filling the well

The new Alder moon in Aries was on April 8th as well as the eclipse! As usual, it was cloudy here. I ended up watching the eclipse through Time and Date’s YouTube channel.

The full Pink/Sap boiling moon in Scorpio 🙂 was on the 23rd. It was overcast, of course. We even has a bit of a thunder storm. Though the cloud broke up a little around sunset, there was no viewing to be had.

Picture of a quarter moon among wispy clouds above trees.

On the 4th, I attended a Clarion Writers Workshop about “Avoiding common pitfalls in writing climate fiction” with Sarena Ulibarri. Very informative about the tropes to avoid.

I signed up for Cece Lyra’s “Tension, Conflict, and Stakes” on the 11th. This was followed up with a Q&A on the 15th. While Cece’s webinars tend to go long, she shares invaluable information on how to create and maintain tension in your novel. 

The online edition of Can-Con took place on the 20th. I caught several of the panels and will catch the couple I missed on replay. Fabulous con.

And The FOLD online conference was held from April 28th to May 1st. So glad to be able to view the replays.

Finnish classes continued on Monday evenings throughout the month.

I signed up for a CAMH presentation on “Sleep and cancer” on the 24th. Interesting.

Later the same night, my support group met. April’s topic was “Dealing with diminished executive function,” something I’m struggling with right now.

What I’m watching and reading

The first watch of the month was the second part of Invincible (Amazon), season 2. Insane and bloody as ever. Mark makes some critical decisions. He can’t do it all. And maybe he can’t avoid becoming like his father.

Then, Phil and I finished watching The 3 Body Problem (Netflix). I read the first book of the trilogy years ago, and it was again fascinating to see how the adaptation differs from the source material. Also, the DBs produced an inside the episode companion series for further insight. I really enjoyed it. Phil had his usual beef about the misappropriation and misinterpretation of the science, but he also enjoyed watching.

I watched the new (but sadly not improved) Road House (Amazon). Though Jake Gyllenhaal was pleasing to watch as Dalton, he was very enclosed and not very engaging on an emotional level. In the original, Patrick Swayze’s Dalton was clear about his intention to train the Road House’s existing bouncers to do their jobs better. In this version, there is simply a montage showing Dalton training one person on site and recruiting another. Long story short, though I could list all the movie’s faults, it was only mildly entertaining and there was no story at all. I didn’t care about any of the characters.

I finally finished watching the final season of The Flash (Netflix). It was the same old, same old right to the end, even bringing back the Reverse Flash, Godspeed, Zoom, and Savatar to join a resurrected Eddie Thawn, the new avatar of the negative speed force to battle team Flash in the finale. This battle coincides with Nora’s birth. All ends well (of course) even though adult Nora is present for her own birth and even holds her infant self. I guess paradox gives the Allen-West family a pass. About three (of five) seasons too long. A solid meh.

I also finished watching the most recent season of The Witcher (Netflix), the last with Henry Cavill. The series has been pretty hit and miss overall. In keeping with that assessment, there were things I liked about this season, and there were things I didn’t like. The thing that bothered me most was that the three main characters were separated throughout much of the season, and nothing seemed to progress the plot. The plot was largely MIA, and I didn’t care to remember who the principle parties were (i.e., in the war).

Then Phil and I watched the first season of Fallout (Amazon). Phil has played the Fallout games and was interested in what the adaptation would look like. The writers and showrunners opted (intelligently, in my opinion) to tell an entirely new story in the Fallout universe. The characters were complex, and their journeys were compelling. Thoroughly enjoyed and highly recommended.

I watched Wish (Disney +). I understand the criticism levelled at it, but honestly, it’s a cute celebration of all Disney movies. In fact, while the credits roll, all of the characters from the Disney movies appear. It’s basically an extended metaphor for Disney as an entertainment company. It was enjoyable and the perfect thing to watch while recovering.

Next, I finished Lessons in Chemistry (Apple TV +). Loved! Brie Larson is fabulous as Elizabeth Zott. I’m not going to say much about the series except that you should watch it.

My first read of the month was Joanne Epp’s Cattail Skyline. In her second collection of poetry, Epp rambles through the prairies, explores a creek, travels to Cambodia, rides a train, and reminisces about a summer cottage. Again and again, she returns to the Cemetery road as she watches it through the seasons and years. Her keen observations reveal secret insights in every slant of light and experience of place.

Then, I finished Ray Bradbury’s The Illustrated Man. Holy heck is this linked short story collection depressing! I think there was one story that didn’t end in death and horror. Come to think of it, The Martian Chronicles was like that, too. Characters, usually men, make hubristic or fascistic decisions and get their comeuppance. Even the conscientious objectors can’t escape doom. This may be a heretical take, but the book left me feeling meh.

Next, I listened to Callahan’s Con by Spider Robinson. Having now read Legend & Lattes, I can see Robinson’s Callahan series as a predecessor. A hippie, inclusive, punny, and intoxicant-positive predecessor, but a predecessor, nonetheless. The books, whether set at the original Callahan’s Place, Mary’s Place, or The Place, focus on found family, a kind of travelling commune, if you will, and the power of love to overcome all disasters.

I listened to Robert Heinlein’s The Puppet Masters. It might just be the narrator, but I found the main character, Sam, rather whiny, but still bordering on toxic masculinity. Again, the book and its author are products on their time.

Then I read Tanya Huff’s Valor’s Choice. Solid military SF. A marine combat unit is given the “easy” assignment of accompanying a delegation to sign a new member species, the silsviss, into their confederation. When their ship crashes in a “reserve” where young male silsviss are sent until their volatile adolescence passes, and their military transport is suddenly called out of orbit on an urgent matter, Staff Sergeant Toren Kerr must act quickly to protect the ambassadors and find shelter until they can be rescued. Is this the work of the Others or have they run afoul of some other nefarious scheme?

And that was the month in this writer’s life.

Until next month, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!

The next chapter: a month in the writerly life. melaniemarttila.ca