grant applications

The next chapter: February 2025 update

/ Melanie Marttila

Tolerating ambiguity. It’s harder than it looks.

A picture of spuce against a cloudy sky.

Life in general

I’m doing what I can to manage dysregulation and my health in light of the political shenanigans taking place here in Canada as well as south of the border.

We got a reprieve on the tariff situation, then tariffs were imposed on steel and aluminum. On top of the general tariff on all Canadian imports to take effect next month. Our government continues to try to mount a defense.

From The Skimm Daily (week of Feb 17):

“Of Trump’s 75 (and counting) [executive orders], 17 overhaul foreign policy, shifting US stances on Russia, Ukraine, and Gaza. [14] target immigration, fueling his mass deportation blitz. He’s also trying to end birthright citizenship, gut federal agencies, and is going after gender-affirming care and DEI . . . All while the new DOGE office slashes budgets (saying “you’re fired” to everyone from park rangers to nuclear weapons workers). Oh, and Trump’s been actively trolling Canada . . . . The courts seem to be the only guardrail checking his power, with more than 70 lawsuits already in motion — some making their way to the Supreme Court. But the (somehow very real) question remains: Will Trump’s team simply ignore the rulings?”

The orange menace is taking all the pages from the dictator’s playbook. And doing everything he can to serve up the Ukraine to Putin while taking Gaza for his latest high-end development. It’s all kinds of batshit.

Getting back to the phrase at the top of the post. Some of you may recognize it from various job descriptions. Tolerating ambiguity is a catch-all phrase meaning you gotta shut up and put up with ALL. THE. BULLSHIT. From everyone. All the time.

So, we’re all tolerating ambiguity these days.

It’s hard to know how to fight against a madman but fight we must.

And with a record low voter turnout (about 20% in Sudbury—WTF?), Ontario handed Ford another majority. Yeah, he’s hot to fight Trump (whom he formerly adored), but he’s tanked our health care system and our education system and done a whole bunch of other despicable things. The future isn’t looking so bright.

I’m (trying) to tolerate a lot of ambiguity at work right now, too, and feeling dysregulated every other day it seems. I try to listen to my body and my brain, but I can’t take a day to regulate and level out as often as I seem to need to.

And I just read an article that says to recover an hour of sleep debt, you have to get a full night’s sleep (!). That means that I’m running on a deficit of three night’s sleep for every full work week. Gah! The weekend never feels like it’s enough time off. Now I know why!

The month in writing

I was still trying to finish Reality Bomb. So close!

Will take a break after I finish next month to write the query and synopsis and then embark on a listening pass to see how many words I can trim.

At the same time, I started research on the period between the two world wars, the temporal setting for Alice in Thunderland. Most of the books were available through either the Greater Sudbury Public Library (GSPL) or the J.N. Desmarais Library at Laurentian University. I found a couple of YouTube channels to watch/listen to as well.

I sent in the first 10 pages of RB along with a semi-query and comps to Cece Lyra for her upcoming Start It Right webinar. She may critique my pages live in her webinar. I’m sure I’ll get some solid feedback, one way or the other.

Suzy got back to me. Turns out she was just insanely busy. Our first meeting of 2025 was on the 20th. And it was great. It’s not like there weren’t issues, but I’m improving. One more session to go!

Aaannnd . . . I may be on a certain book coach’s podcast in the future! Stay tuned 🙂

On the 22nd, I was informed that “The Beekeeper,” my story in Through the Portal, has been nominated for ECO24: The Year’s Best Speculative Ecofiction. I already submitted to the Aurora Awards and The Year’s Best Canadian Fantasy and Science Fiction last month. We’ll see if anything comes of it.

On the 23rd, I saw this lovely review of Through the Portal by Lorina Stephens for On Spec.

I received notification of my Public Lending Right payment. Woohoo! And not in a facetious way. People took The Art of Floating out of the library last year! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

But I also received notification that I was not awarded two of the three grants I applied for. I hope that means I’m still in the running for the third. Everything crossed! And yeah, that’s as painful as you might imagine.

Filling the well

The month started with Imbolc, and I put together a poetry reading covering the winter months for the still somewhat bleak midwinter.

I also lit my altar and did a guided meditation. I’ve discovered that I can only do a guided meditation, or something similar, in which I have something to focus on besides my thoughts. As an autistic prone to rumination, if I give my thoughts any opportunity, they take control and the meditation is over. The thoughts I tend to ruminate on are inevitably dark.

The full bear moon in Leo was on the 12th. The night was overcast. I did another guided meditation.

Moon pictures have been disappointing lately, all smudgy and out of focus. But I did take a couple of decent pictures of the creek. The ducks were visiting in the second one.

I tried to get some decent photos, but it’s been cold out and I haven’t been able to focus my phone camera properly.

The new rowan moon in Pisces was on the 27th. I did another guided meditation.

On the 4th, I attended a Clarion/Grist webinar on climate fiction with Annalee Newitz and Omar El Akkad. Interesting insights into climate fiction. And I always love Annalee’s presentations.

On the 5th, I attended a virtual talk, “We can’t teach a book with that word in it,” with Lawrence Hill and Debra Thompson. A discussion of banned books and the responsibility of teachers and professors to their students. Excellent.

And I signed up for another Tiffany Yates Martin webinar offered by Jane Friedman on January 29th. Because spoons, I watched the replay on the 7th. Excellent webinar with great resources.

In terms of physical/mental health and self-care, I took the first week of the month off to rest and recover. And get some tasks done. Tax prep, filing, unearthing all my journals, and cleaning my office. I got everything done but the cleaning.

I had a massage appointment on the 12th. I love my massage therapist!

My (currently) bi-annual mammogram was on the 13th.

Also on the 13th, I attended another RBC Patients and Family Learning Space webinar about insomnia. Interesting, but I am doing (or try to do) most of what they suggest.

And my support group meeting was on the 26th. This month’s topic was self-advocacy and accommodation.

What I’m watching and reading

Another series dropped off my watch list. I decided to try Psych (Netflix) after watching Talis Adler’s (Talis the Introvert) impassioned video essay in which she made the case that Psych was the best Sherlock Holmes adaptation ever made. I gave it a whole season, but I never got into it. A solid meh. Sorry Talis.

The first series I finished watching in February was the second season of Shrinking (Apple TV +). Honestly, it was better than the first. I won’t say much about it because I want y’all to check it out if you can.

I was watching the rest of Outlander season 7 (Amazon/Stack TV) but Stack’s licensing for the series lapsed before I could get there. Again. Season 8 is supposed to be the last, even though they haven’t caught up with the novels yet (strictly speaking). They’re compressing events and inserting them where is makes sense, but because I rely on the books for the actual story (love you, Diana!), the series can feel both action-packed and hurtling toward its conclusion.

I loved what I saw but decided that another streaming service was not in the budget. We’ll be deactivating Stack TV soonish as they’ve raised their subscription fee. Just one more series to finish first.

Then, I finished watching the first season of High Potential (CTV). Morgan is a high potential intellectual and mother of three who works as a nighttime cleaner for the LAPD. One night, she changes a murder board, and her life, forever. When called to the carpet for her vandalism, Morgan explains her reasoning and helps detective Karadec solve the murder. Selena, head of the major crimes division, offers Morgan a job as a consultant. Morgan initially refuses but then accepts on the condition that Selena help find her first husband who disappeared 15 years ago. Think of Morgan as the Erin Brockovich of the LAPD. Fun.

Next, I watched the first season of Interview with the Vampire. CTV SciFi aired it, and I’m glad I caught it. I really enjoyed the second season, and now I have the context to appreciate it even more. A most excellent re-envisioning of the novel and previous adaptations.

I finished watching the second and last season of Arcane: League of Legends (Netflix). The animation was even more striking, the pace just a little less hectic, and the story stronger than in season 1. I think they could have done even better if they squeezed in a tenth episode, but I’m happy with what we got. Everyone’s messed up after season one. A foreign warlord (Embessa) tries to take over Piltover. Victor becomes (or at least awakens) the Arcane. Vander returns in a surprising form. I can’t say much more without spoiling everything. You’ll just have to watch it.

Then, I finished watching the whole run of The Owl House (Disney +). Luz has always been a weirdo, and she’s supposed to go to summer camp but ends up opening a door to another world, which slams shut behind her. In the Burning Lands, she meets Eda, the owl lady, and King, who looks like a puppy wearing a bone mask. She convinces Eda to teach her magic (even though she’s a human) and soon learns the reason Eda is known as the owl lady. When she discovers that there is a magic school, she makes friends of the other students and eventually convinces the principle to allow her to enroll. Ultimately, Luz wants to find a way back home, which is why she wants to learn magic.

From the first, Luz is a chaotic transformation engine. Unfailingly kind, she changes everyone she meets. Eventually she does find a way home but realizes that the Burning Lands—and the people she’s come to love there—is where she belongs. There is so much more to this series—curses, conspiracies, queer love, the collector—and the final season was squished into three 1-hour episodes, which didn’t do it any favours, but I loved it overall. 

My first February listen was The Complete Guide to Tarot and Astrology by Louise Edington. An interesting book linking two of my new age-y interests. Most of the book was taken up with descriptions of the major and minor arcana and their astrological associations, but there was a good introduction about how to bring the two practices together, spreads, and application.

Then, I listened to Valor’s Trial, the fourth in Tanya Huff’s Valor’s Confederation series. Gunnery Seargeant Torin Kerr is thought to be killed in a battle against the Others, but her lover Craig refuses to believe it. Torin’s survived . . . a LOT over the past three novels. It can’t end like this. Meanwhile, Torin wakes in a subterranean POW camp where fascist elements have taken over, and everyone else seems to have lost the will to fight back, let alone escape. Loved! Torin’s as kick-ass as ever.

Next, I read I am AI by Ai Jiang. This novelette was shortlisted for the Astounding, BSFA, Hugo, and Nebula Awards. In the city of Emit, Ai is a cyborg content writer competing with actual AI content writers. She supports her community with her upgrades between shifts and barters her organic body parts for upgrades. In an effort to work harder and faster and make even more of the money she needs to keep herself and her small group of friends alive, Ai sells her heart. A fabulous cyber-fable.

I finished my reread of The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis. Amazing how this gentle fantasy story stands up. Modern children might want more action or suspense or whatever, but I still love this childhood favourite.

I’m going to give the reread a bit of a break and dive into research for Alice in Thunderland. I’ll probably alternate between reread and research, just to keep my brain from going too far down the rabbit hole.

Then, I finished reading Lev Grossman’s The Magicians. Very different from the series. And I know Quentin’s journey is all about dealing (or not) with his trauma, but I did not like him as much as a character. A good read with lots of insights about the adaptation from book to series and the possible reasons for the choices made.

Next, I listened to Blackthorn’s Botanical Magic: The Green Witch’s Guide to Essential Oils for Spellcraft, Ritual & Healing by Amy Blackthorn. Again, as per many of the paganish books I listen to (because they’re part of Audible’s free catalogue), most of the book was a listing of the essential oils and their correspondences with select recipes. I’ve recently purchased a bunch of essential and perfume oils and an eager to get at some synergy experimentation, but it will have to wait until I have the time to devote to it.

Then, I read a short story by Premee Mohamed, “At Every Door a Ghost.” In a world where a scientific AI makes a deadly mistake in the name of experimentation, and all science becomes closely monitored and restricted as a result, two scientists try to buck their new big brother and fail. Or maybe it’s a qualified success?

Next, I finished Piers Anthony’s On a Pale Horse, the first of his Incarnations of Immortality series. Yes, this is another series I’ve read out of order, but it really doesn’t matter. The books all stand alone and intertwine in different ways. The unique bit with this unabridged audiobook was the author’s afterword in which Anthony talks about the genesis for the book (and series). He bemoans being typecast in his genre and wants to write literary fiction. Unable to break the mold, he incorporates more serious topics into OaPH, namely his mother’s death and his own brush with mortality.

Zane is a hapless aura photographer, who, out of money, about to be evicted, and desperate, resorts to using the last of his money to buy a magical gem that should guarantee fortune. Unfortunately, the gem can only locate lose change and, after foiling an assault and coming into possession of a gun, he contemplates suicide. Until Death enters his room, and he instinctively shoots the incarnation, thereby becoming the new Death. The story includes some pieces of puzzles from other books in the series, like how Luna, Orb’s sister, came to be Death’s beloved. Again, I found Zane and Luna a bit on the oblivious side, and the blatant sexism (yes, Anthony was a product of his time) irked. But it was a decent book and, if nothing else, shows me what I want to avoid in my own fiction.

I read Starter Villain by John Scalzi. Charlie was a journalist until he was fired and now struggles to make ends meet by substitute teaching. His dream is to buy a local pub, but he barely makes enough to keep himself and his two cats, Hera and Persephone, fed. Add to that the fact that he’s living in the house his father left to him, which his step-siblings are continually pressuring him to move out of so they can sell it and split the proceeds, and Charlie’s pretty desperate. Then the uncle he hasn’t seen since he was a kid dies, and Charlie is propelled into a high-stakes world of secret cabals and enhanced animal operatives (Hera and Persephone are two of those), in which he is nothing more than a start villain. Super fun read.

Then, I read Cats and Dogs in Space, a speculative poetry collection by Lisa Timpf. I loved this collection, but I must confess to having a serious soft spot for furry family members. The collection is divided into four sections: From the Headlines, in which the poems explore real life examples of speculative themes; Legendary, in which the mythological dogs and cats take the stage; The Great Hereafter, a heartbreaking exploration of loss and grief; and Cats and Dogs of the Future, which chronicles the adventures of robot dogs in colonial space and more. “Musings of a Shelter Dog” brought me right back to the thoughts and feelings inspired when I read Andre Alexis’ Fifteen Dogs, and “Laika” and every poem in The Great Hereafter made me weepy, to be honest. Highly recommend to lovers of poetry, cats, dogs, space, or any combination thereof.

And that was the month in this writer’s life.

Until next month, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!

The next chapter: A month in the writerly life. https://melaniemarttila.ca

The next chapter: September 2023 update

/ Melanie Marttila

Welcome to October, my favourite month of the year (my birthday notwithstanding). May you find a way to shift the veil during this spectral season and see what’s on the other side 🙂

September began with a four-day heatwave, from September 3rd to the 6th. Then, overnight the temperature dropped to below seasonal. But I got out onto the patio! After that, it was a beautiful September, weather-wise. Above seasonal, sunny. Just lovely.

Picture of a dawn sky with Venus among the clouds.

Life in general

After my big project was finished in August, I’ve hit a period of dysregulation and am in recovery. But I’m also still working, so the recovery is taking a while. I don’t have enough annual leave to take a longer period of time off, and, while I have a lot of sick leave banked, I need a medical note to support more than three days off in a row. I’d need to make an appointment with my doctor and get him to fill out the official medical leave form.

The process comes with its own set of difficulties (read autistic inertia/demand avoidance). Really, I’m just being lazy, but I don’t have the spoons to take on more administrivia at the moment. So, I’m taking my sick leave a day or two at a time, here and there. I had a couple of days of leave in September, but I was just starting to feel better when I had a reading to deliver. It was a good event, but just enough to reset my recovery.

And then I had a schedule change at work so I could observe the delivery of the big project I finished in August. The training delivery was in the Atlantic region, so I was getting up super early. The upside was that I got to finish my workday earlier, but the schedule change was a disruption.

So, executive function is low right now. I’m forgetting things I would normally remember, making errors, and stumbling and bumping into things. The brain is having trouble braining. This is a part of the autistic life that I’m still learning to navigate, to be conscious of my executive function in the moment and to give myself the recovery time I need. But it’s a challenge on many fronts.

The time of year and the slow reduction of daylight hours also has an impact on my energy levels. It’s why I save the bulk of my annual leave for the darker months of the year.

I’ve notified my team lead that I will be applying for a self-funded leave in the new year so that I can focus on the launch for The Art of Floating and any readings in the weeks immediately following. My intent is to use as much of that time as I can for a more focused recovery, as well, but I’ll have the launch and readings and possibly conferences to attend. We’ll see how it goes.

The month in writing

Most of my month was dedicated to revisiting my inside outline, which I’m rewriting by hand, so there hasn’t been a lot of writing or revision to record this month.

I have managed to write a few new poems, however. And there’s always the writing to record from this update/newsletter.

Image of an Excel spreadsheet showing my writing and revision progress.

I met with Suzy for the 6th and final time (for this package) on September 14th. I hadn’t finished my revised inside outline but got as far as this submission. As usual, Suzy provided insights I wouldn’t have discovered on my own.

I’m taking a break for a month to get the revised inside outline done, write up my report for the CSFFA about my professional development grant funding (done), prepare for my Writers in the Schools visit (done), and see if I can’t get some poetry written (done), and make further progress on some short fiction (done).

I submitted another grant application on the 7th. And then another on the 30th.

Also on the 7th, I received my professional photo package! You may have noticed the mid-month post about the pictures 🙂

On the 11th, I received notification that my last grant application from the spring was not funded.

Something that I haven’t thought to mention in past months is that I’ve continued to submit my poetry for consideration. Welp, those rejections have started to roll in.

On the 16th, I met with my publisher. It was a good meeting and things are progressing. Cover reveal should be coming soon, and once the collection is posted for pre-orders, you know I’ll be posting again. Now, it’s time for readings and other networking opportunities.

Then, on the 20th, I received notification that the creative non-fiction piece I’d submitted for the Sudbury Writers’ Guild Superstack anthology has been accepted! My first CNF acceptance! I edited the piece and returned it and my signed contract on the 25th.

My publisher was in touch again on the 23rd to advise that Sudbury’s current poet laureate, Kyla Heyming, had an opening in the second of two Poetry on the Water cruises. I jumped at the opportunity and read my poetry in public for the first time in a year (!) It was a lovely afternoon.

Picture of The William Ramsey cruise boat.

Filling the well

I observed the hazel new moon in Virgo on the 14th with a guided meditation.

The fall equinox was on the 23rd this year. I lit my alter and gave some thought to the coming season and what it will bring.

A picture of my altar.

And the full corn supermoon in Aries was on the 29th.

In terms of writerly events, I started the month with a Dan Blank webinar, “How to find the readers who will love your writing,” on September 8th. I purchased a consultation package, filled out a form, and received an informative response video. Then, on the 22nd, Dan and I had a video call to discuss my platform and focusing in on what I share and why. He’s encouraging me to go for it and not to wait. Again, autistic inertia/demand avoidance is playing a role. Highly recommend.

Then, I attended a FOLD Academy webinar with Jael Richardson on “The business of publishing,” on the 9th. Very good. Lots of useful information. Love Jael 🙂

I had registered to receive the recording of “Healing history’s wounds,” a Writing the Other webinar with Nisi Shawl back in August. Unfortunately, Nisi was ill, and the webinar had to be rescheduled for September 10th. It was awesome! There are a couple of strategies I want to try out with my solarpunk/alt history novella.

Then, it was Science Fiction Writers’ Week with Pro Writing Aid from the 11th through to the 14th. I did not watch all the sessions. I was there for a few special events. Lauren Beukes, Catherine Asaro, Julie Czerneda, and Jordan Ifueko.

The next Donald Maass webinar from Free Expressions, “Imperfect Heroes and Excellent Anti-heroes,” was also on the 14th, so I watched the replay. Excellent, as always.

I signed up for a Tiffany Yates Martin webinar through Jane Friedman on the 15th. “Handling multiple storylines” was great. Tiffany always pulls out examples that really illustrate what she’s talking about.

I signed up for another Mary Robinette Kowal webinar on “Endings, or How to Wrap Things Up” on the 17th. I got some solid advice on my WIP that I can use when rewriting my inside outline.

“The Art & Craft of Writing Powerful Emotion” with Ellen Bass offered through Authors Publish was on the 27th. I opted to watch the replay because of a conflict.

Carly Watters and Cece Lyra presented their “Writing the Perfect First Five Pages” webinar, also on the 27th. Basically, the best of their advice from The Shit No One Tells You About Writing podcast.

Finally, there was another SFWA connecting flights panel on “Genre Benders and Blenders: Storytelling Beyond Tropes and Conventions” on Sept 30th. It was a nice ending to the month.

Moving into the self-care portion of the month, I signed up for “Sidewalk oracles” with Pat Tallman from the 4th through the 7th. It’s all about being open to guidance on your morning walks. There were several different techniques to help get into a mindful and receptive mood.

On the 18th was my next massage appointment. I didn’t quite get to the rest and digest stage, but it was a much-needed respite.

I had my semi-annual dental checkup on the 20th.

What I’m watching and reading

I couldn’t resist. The reviews have been so horrible, I just had to watch The Flash (HBO/Crave). It wasn’t the trash fire I was led to believe. Don’t get me wrong. It was bad. But I’ve seen worse. >koff, koff< Black Adam.

Phil and I watched the final season of Titans (Netflix). It was full of plot holes and so rushed. I mean, it all feels kind of pointless. DC’s clearing the slates and starting over … again.

Next, Phil and I watched the second season of Good Omens (Amazon). I don’t know what everyone’s upset about. It’s clear that Aziraphale and Crowley love each other. We thought the second season was great and are looking forward to the conclusion of the trilogy.

I watched Elemental (Disney +). This was another movie that struggled out of the gate, but as far as I could see, it was typical Pixar fare. A sweet story about an immigrant family trying to make it in a new city, the pressures of tradition, and finding your own way in the world. The romantic subplot was a little meh, but overall, I enjoyed Elemental.

Then, I watched Marcel the Shell with Shoes On (Amazon). OMG so sweet! I mean, totally ridiculous, but So. Sweet! A balm to my neurodivergent soul.

Next, I watched the live action version of The Little Mermaid (Disney +). It was … okay? Exactly the same as the animated version with a little more diversity in the cast and a couple of additional musical numbers? Halle Bailey has a great voice. Melissa McCarthy added a little more nuance to Ursula. It was completely adequate and what I expected, but I keep wondering why the movie industry reboots everything or keeps franchises going on (Fast & Furious, I’m looking at you) long after they’ve ceased to be entertaining. There are so many stories out there that could be adapted into great series or movies. Get creative, people! Try something new.

I also finished watching Tiny Beautiful Things (Disney +). This was an adaptation of Cheryl Strayed’s book of the same name, which was a collection of her Dear Sugar columns. It was an interesting story about a woman who finds purpose offering advice to others while her life falls apart. There is meaningful resolution in the end. Kathryn Hahn was superb.

After a brief internal struggle, I gave up on Riverdale (Netflix). I started watching the final season, but thanks to Friendly Space Ninja, I learned that the final season doesn’t resolve any of the plot threads from previous seasons. It just reboots the show to the comics’ original 1950s setting. So, no real wrap-up of the pseudo-Marvel multiverse/superpower storylines. No resolution for Betty and the trash bag killer. No future for any of those characters. Just a handwave to the fact that the other timeline no longer exists, and they’re stuck in the past. They get to hold onto the “good” memories, though. Final word on the series as a whole? Meh.

I finally finished watching The Crown (Netflix). The latest season brought viewers up to the point where Di’s bombshell BBC interview has taken place, Di and Charles have divorced, and Di’s about to meet an engaged Dodi.

I watched All the Old Knives (Amazon). It’s a tragic political thriller about the aftermath of a terrorist hostage-taking that resulted in 120 deaths. Years after the event, a CIA agent is sent to investigate. Evidence has been uncovered that there was a mole in the unit.

Finally, Phil and I watched the first two seasons of Bleach: The Thousand Year War (Disney +). Loved! We’ve been fans since the anime first came out and started following the manga as they were released following the last anime series. Season 3 should be released in the spring and 4 before the end of 2024. This could be the last series for Bleach. Creator Tite Kubo continues to struggle with health issues.

The first book I read in September was Samuel R. Delaney’s Babel 17. Rydra Wong is a poet and linguist, and she is called upon by the military to decipher Babel 17, which they believe is a code the Invaders are using to relay messages. Rydra figures out that Babel 17 is a language, not a code, and travels into deep space to solve the riddle of what it is and what is does to the people who understand it.

Then, I took a left turn and listened to Carmen Maria Machado’s Her Body and Other Parties: Stories. It gave me the same flavour as Mona Awad’s Bunny. Surrealist body horror is my best approximation. Though I did find her take on Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, an epic poem—yes, I will call it a poem—involving doppelgangers, love, and family to be … kind of hilarious, actually (what does that say about me?). Unsettling, but good.

I finished Premee Mohamed’s The Annual Migration of Clouds. Really good. In a post-apocalyptic Alberta, most people have been infected by Cad, a parasitic fungus that seeks to save its host, no matter what. Reid has been given an opportunity to leave her community, but it involves a dangerous journey. And how can she leave when her mother and her best friend depend on her for their survival? A boar hunt promises to give Reid the means to support her mother, but will her Cad let her take the risk?

Then, I listened to The Mabinogion. I’ve wanted to read it for years, but never gotten around to it. Like most older tale collections, it has a rhythm to its storytelling. Several rhythms, actually, because it’s several different stories collected into one volume. There’s a lot that’s similar to The Kalevala.

I finished Solomon’s Seal, by Skyla Dawn Cameron. This is the first in the Livi Talbot series, pitched as Tomb Raider meets The Gilmour Girls. In a world utterly changed by “The Pulse,” which unleashed magic, magical abilities, and magical creatures globally, Olivia—Livi—Talbot, once heiress, now impoverished treasure hunter for hire, struggles to keep her daughter in private school, pay the rent, beat her archeologist brother to the next artifact, and fend off the unwanted advances of past and potential boyfriends. When a rich benefactor sends her to Ethiopia in search of Solomon’s Seal, Livi has to dodge dragons, betrayal, and her employer’s mysterious second in command. Very good. 

Finally, I finished Ada Hoffmann’s The Fallen, sequel to The Outside. Yasira Shien is all but incapacitated following the miracle she performed in the first book. Tiv and the Seven—young people with Outside abilities—try to help Jai’s survivors, while being hunted by angels and fallen angels alike. But the gone people are working toward something that could make life for the people of Jai better, if anyone could understand them. Neurodivergence is centred in Hoffmann’s novels. Really good.

And that was the month in this writer’s life.

Until next month, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!

The next chapter, a month in the writerly life. melaniemarttila.ca

The next chapter: April 2023 update

/ Melanie Marttila

Welcome to the first next chapter, back in its monthly format. This means it will be epic. Sorry, not sorry.

The month in writing

I’ve had to completely revamp my annual plan. Well, not completely, but mostly 🙂

My original plan had been to finish mapping out Alice in Thunderland in January and finish the first draft in February and March while continuing to work with Suzy on Reality Bomb. But a budget situation at work and the attendant loss of income meant I couldn’t continue working with Suzy. We parted ways at the end of January.

I then thought I’d continue working on my own and sign up again once my position and salary had been restored, but Phil had his accident (on Valentine’s Day, I’ll remind you), and all writing work was suspended until such time as he recovered.

In the interim, I got the hare-brained idea to start applying for grants. All of them.

Now that Phil’s recovered, I’ve committed to …

  1. Finish my #ActuallyAutistic Author presentation script and resources,
  2. Revise my poetry manuscript from now through June (in progress),
  3. Write a creative non-fiction (CNF) piece for a call due in early May (in progress),
  4. Work on another CNF piece,
  5. Revise a short story for an anthology call later in May (started),
  6. Start working with Suzy again (come hell or high water, as they say),
  7. Revise another short story for a potential project,
  8. Apply for more grants in May and June (working on one, now),
  9. Deliver my #AAA presentation in June or July,
  10. Revise yet another short story for future submission,
  11. Revamp my web site (some of it’s already done—just bits and pieces left),
  12. Work on new poetry,
  13. Work on a CNF project,
  14. Start work on my new fiction project in September, and
  15. Apply for more grants, September through November.

You can see why I’ve decided to cut back on blogging in the interim.

Alice is taking a back seat, for now. I think it was a good project, but I don’t have the head space or energy to get back to it right now. I do have the outline finished and a solid idea of where I need to head when I do get back to revisions. So, it’s in a good place.

That was the only big change from my original plan, aside from pushing out some timelines because life is what happens when you may other any plans.

So far, the experiment in rearranging my creative life (i.e., giving up curation and returning to monthly updates) seems to be working. I’m a lot less stressed out, that’s for sure. Or I was.

Just gonna let the Excel speak for itself.

Unfortunately, the universe couldn’t take it easy on me. An added stress is that a general strike was called on April 19, 2023. I’m showing up and showing solidarity, but the first day was bitterly cold and I had to take a nap after I got home (which I never do) to warm up and recover. Subsequent days weren’t any easier, though I planned a bit better each day.

My executive function is definitely compromised. Meltdowns each morning, naps most afternoons, and I’m having trouble functioning on any level. At least I didn’t have to picket on the weekends. As of today (April 30, 2023) there’s a new offer on the table, but I haven’t heard anything yet. I expect we’ll be back on the picket line tomorrow.

In other developments, I’ll be one of three judges for the K. Valerie Connor Memorial Poetry Celebration contest held by the Leacock Museum in Orillia this year. I’m honoured to have been considered.

I received another bit of amazing (ah-MA-zing!) news this morning, but I’ll have to wait a bit before I make that announcement. Stay tuned! And yes, I’m a tease.

Filling the well

Just picking up from where I left off in my next chapter weekly updates. I’m not recapping the whole month (!) As you’ll see, it’s been a month FULL of events.

I attended the online book launch for Fonda Lee’s The Untethered Sky on April 10th. A great conversation between Fonda and Andrea Stewart about all aspects of the creative process.

I had signed up for a FOLD Academy webinar with Liselle Sambury on April 8th, but was unable to watch it live, because recovery. I watched the replay once it was posted to their YouTube channel. It’s an interesting method, and Sambury offered a lot of alternatives for outlining and tracking your novel.

I signed up for an Authors Publish webinar on a new (to me) poetry form, the zuihitsu, with Eugenia Leigh. Because it was held during the workday, I watched the replay. Zuihitsu is a fascinating form, but I don’t know if I could manage the consciously disordered nature of a zuihitsu collection. It does track with some of the ideas I’m hoping to play with poetically, though. We’ll see where it leads.

I met with my poetry editor, Tanis MacDonald, on the 12th. It was less fraught than I thought it would be (and that would have been on me—Tanis was lovely). Now I have my marching orders and some work to do 🙂

I attended the Writing Success Series Discovery Night on April 13th. I’ve signed up for the Donald Maass six-webinar package and will return for individual sessions by Eric Maisel, Janice Hardy, Tiffany Yates Martin, and Beth Baranay.

I signed up for another Dan Blank webinar about defining your identity and creative voice on April 14th. Again, because it was during the workday, I watched the replay. Dan has a lot of good information about how to engage with social media on your terms and it all begins with defining your identity and creative voice.

On April 15th, my friend and former poet laureate of Sudbury, Vera Constantineau, launched her poetry collection. Enlightened by Defilement is a collection of haibun inspired by the 108 defilements of Buddhism. It was a lovely afternoon at the Hilton Garden Inn, good food, and a lot of familiar faces that I haven’t seen in a while 🙂

That was a big week of writing-related events, I realized, and dialled it back a bit. Yeah, all of the above was in one week. I might have overdone things a bit.

Just four more writing-related events in the month.

I purchased a Rambo Academy webinar on revision that I could watch at my leisure, which I did.

I attended Mary Robinette Kowal’s Barriers to Writing webinar on Sunday, April 23. It was extremely helpful in a few different ways.

Finally, I registered for a TWUC webinar on marketing and self-promotion presented by Rod Carley and Ali Bryan, which I also watched in replay. With my debut poetry collection coming up next year, it was very helpful!

I almost forgot! The FOLD started on April 30th, but as the bulk of the event is in May, I’ll leave the details until next month’s update.

In the self-care department, I had an appointment with my doctor because of a bump on the inside of my wrist. It’s a ganglion cyst and nothing to worry about unless it gets bigger and/or starts causing pain or impeding my range of motion. Something to monitor for now.

Phil had another physio appointment and an appointment with an endocrinologist for his type II diabetes. Unfortunately, the diabetic clinic is being shut down. It’s disappointing because he was finally getting the treatment and support he needed. And then his appointment with the endocrinologist was cancelled. Super frustrating.

I took Torvi to the vet for her annual exam and flea/tic/worm medication. An expensive trip, but she was her crazy, adorable self for Dr. Andrews, and she’ll be protected for the coming year.

What I’m watching and reading

I finished watching The Witcher: Blood Origin (Netflix). An interesting origin story for the witchers, with great characters, fight scenes, and a tie-in to the main series. Also, it was only four episodes, so it didn’t have time to fall prey to some of the gaffs other series suffer from.

Next, I watched The Wonder (Netflix), based on the novel of the same name by Emma Donoghue. Mystery and pathos. Lib Wright is a nurse who is called upon, with a nun, to perform a 14-day watch on a girl is a small Irish village who hasn’t eaten in four months. Ah, my heart.

I finished watching the first season of The Peripheral (Amazon). Bizarre and brain-twisty, but I loved it. Virtual reality isn’t just VR. It’s time travel and the creation of alternate realities called stubs. A VR gamer and her ex-military brother are inducted into a program with new technology, and a whole new world of complex future and present political and corporate intrigue changes their lives.

I also finished off the first season of Extraordinary (Disney +). In a world where most people develop powers (some of which are bizarre, and others, totally useless), protagonist Jen is powerless. She’s also a horrible person who has no money to pay for the expensive treatment that could rectify the situation. Growth happens. British series. British humour.

Then, I watched Ghosted (Apple +). It was the fun escape I needed after three days of picketing. Lots of cameos by popular action actors. I was laughing out loud. It might have been the dysregulation, but I enjoyed it. There was some problematic content, though, like the white male protagonist getting all stalkery (repeated texts, tracking her, a surprise trip to see her) on his love interest after she apparently ghosts him. Unfortunately, the stalking is critical to the plot. Like, there would be none without his intrusive and unwanted behaviour.

In reading, I finished T.J. Klune’s Wolfsong. The protagonist, Oxnard, or Ox is clearly autistic coded. And bisexual (pan?). I loved the book for that alone, but it was a love story between a human boy and his wolf pack. Correction, packs. There are some explicit sex scenes if you’re not into that kind of thing. My heart (again)!

Then, I finished The Bookwoman of Troublesome Creek by Kim Michelle Richardson. A fascinating historical fiction based on true events. Look up the blue people. They were an actual thing. And the packhorse librarians. Loved it!

And that was the month in this writer’s life.

Until next month, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!

The next chapter weekly: March 26-April 1, 2023

/ Melanie Marttila

It’s lucky week 13, finishing off March and ending with April Fool’s Day. Which I don’t observe. I’ve never enjoyed practical jokes. Now that I know I’m autistic, this isn’t surprising.

From the tarot, I drew the Hanged Man, which represents ordeal, introspection, fate, acceptance, momento mori, stoicism, and stagnation. Well, I’ve certainly undergone an ordeal, but I’m on the other side of it, emerging from the overwhelm of work and household responsibilities. I have accepted it, but I haven’t been particularly stoic about it. I’m certainly not stagnating. So, it’s a bit of a mixed bag. Not too sure what it means. More changes coming?

From the Shaman’s pack, I drew the Mother, who is Modron (literally Mother). Once again, from the tale of Culhwch and Olwen and the search for Mabon (the child of Modron). This card represents conception. When contemplating new projects, she can provide wise and loving advice. Well, there’s a lot of contemplation happening, and new projects are on the horizon.

The week in writing

Once again, just blogging. And grant applications (which I’m not tracking).

I wrote 1,306 words for the week and 7,084 words for March, total. That’s 109% of my goal. I wrote 581 words on April 1st, essentially this update. And again, the week’s visual tracking is broken into two parts.

I submitted my application for the Access Copyright Foundation’s Professional Development Grant on the 29th! Two down. Two to go (one due in the coming week and one in May).

Filling the well

I finished out the Perfect your Process Summit on Sunday and Monday. It’s usually a good variety of presenters.

I took Phil to his appointment with Dr. Vokey on Friday. The bone is healed! All that’s left is the soft tissue damage, which always take a long time. Phil’s resuming most of his former responsibilities around the house, but he can’t lift heave things yet, so laundry, shopping, etc. are still my responsibility.

What I’m watching and reading

I finished watching RRR. It took me three days with the run-time of 3 hrs 5 minutes. It was an epic tale. A young girl named Malli is abducted by the governor’s wife, and her village’s protector, Bheem, goes to Deli to rescue her. While there, he helps a man named Ram rescue a boy and the two become friends. Bheem is unaware that Ram is the police officer assigned to find and stop him from returning Malli to her village.

That’s just the set up. There are Bollywood numbers, romance, bromance, and tragedy. The fight scenes are over-the-top. Wild animals as distraction! Ram on Bheem’s shoulders, fighting as one! Ram dressed as Arjuna! The two men taking down an army of special forces and then destroying an entire compound!

So. Much. FUN!!

I read Annalee Newitz’s The Future of Another Timeline. A timely (sorry, not sorry) novel about an alternate world in which abortion was never made legal and reproductive rights are severely restricted. In the future, women called Queens have their hands amputated so they can focus on procreation.

But in this alternate reality, there are time machines that were discovered in the Earth. A whole new field of study, chronogeology opens up, and the protagonist wants to edit the past to make a better world. Compelling.

And that was the week in this writer’s life.

Until next tipsday, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!

The next chapter weekly: March 19-25, 2023

/ Melanie Marttila

It’s week 12 already?! Holy cow! Spring has sprung and I’m feeling good 🙂

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From the tarot this week, I drew the eight of cups, which represents abandonment, withdrawal, and escapism. It’s kind of a negative card, but I’m thinking of it in a positive way. Specifically, this is about my purposeful and temporary abandonment of my writing while Phil recovers.

My creativity will out in weird ways, though. I’m working on grant applications and still playing around with my presentation for the SF Canada & Canadian Authors webinar.

From the Shaman’s pack, I drew The Inworld, which is the Third Circle, or Anwwn, the underworld. If you remember, I drew the Circle of Nine, or the Second Circle last week, and Arawn, the Lord of the Underworld the week before. It seems to be a thematic sequence. The Inworld represents accessing the wisdom of the ancestors.

This is interesting, because the third grant I’m applying for will be for a new project which will involve research into Finnish pre-Christian spirituality and history. Maybe my Finnish ancestors will have some wisdom for me.

The week also saw the spring equinox on Monday. I lit up my altar to welcome spring.

On Tuesday, it was the new moon, and I took some time to set my intentions for the next lunar cycle.

The week in writing

Once again, it’s just blogging. I’m not tracking the grant applications or the presentation.

I blogged 1,824 words for the week and 6,359 words for the month to date.

Work on the grant applications is going slow. I think I’m just intimidated. But … the CSFFA grant application is sent, for better or worse. One down. Two to go!

The presentation has taken a back seat while I focus on grants.

Another piece of excellent news: I was accepted into the SFWA as an associate member! Whee!

Thinking of something radical: a blogging and social media sabbatical while I work on revisions for my poetry collection and on Reality Bomb. It might mean several months (like five or six) incommunicado, but I think it’s what I have to do if I really want to get some work done.

Will keep you apprised as things develop.

Filling the well

This week, I registered for a Tiffany Yates Martin webinar through Jane Friedman on mastering point of view. I watched the replay. Tiffany is an amazing instructor and I always learn a lot from her.

I also signed up for an Authors Publish webinar with Book Publicist Isabella Nugent on setting yourself up for success. Again, I watched the replay.

Finally, I signed up for Daniel David Wallace event about perfecting your process. It runs from the 24th to the 27th, so I’ll be mentioning it again next week.

I took the week off work (vacation planned, prior to Phil’s accident) so I could rest and observe both the equinox and the new moon as my pagan heart desires.

I also wanted to accomplish a couple of things, just for me, this week. I wanted to gather all our tax info and send it to our accountant (done!). And I wanted to spring clean my office (also done!). It’s been a while and I decided I wanted to reorganize my bookshelves, cull some outdated filing, and generally tidy up the space. It’s been good for me, getting ready to dive back into writing in a more serious way when Phil’s shoulder is healed.

I had a blissful massage on Tuesday. My parasympathetic nervous system activated, and I got into “rest and digest” mode 🙂 And yes, that means my stomach was growling like ten.

Phil’s also feeling recovered enough that he’s cooking again! Physio is going well, and he’s found a position to sleep in that allows him to get a full night’s rest. He still can’t lift or push anything, though, so I’m still doing the groceries (with him, though, for the most part), laundry, clearing the steps of snow, taking the dog out (she pulls), etc., but progress is being made 🙂

On Wednesday, he went for a walk. On Thursday, he went for a drive. There’s still some awkwardness associated with that activity. He can’t reach with his left arm to turn on the headlights or the turn signal, but he can reach over with his right to flip the switches. He has an appointment with the doctor next Friday (March 31st), so we’ll find out more then.

What I’m watching and reading

I didn’t finish watching any series or watch any movies this week. Well, I started watching RRR, but the three hour and five minute run time meant I couldn’t finish it in a single sitting.

I read Ada Hoffman’s The Outside. I’ve had Ada’s work on my radar for a while because she’s another #actuallyautistic author. Her novel features autistic characters in a world that, while not built for them, willingly makes accommodations for them, and accepts them as part of society. There are still misunderstandings, but it’s a better world than the one we have.

The story’s good, too. Humanity has colonized the galaxy, but AI has become sentient, and something called the Morlock War has Ais installed as gods with cyborg angels doing their bidding. Outside the galaxy, the titular Outside, is heretical, and the god Nemesis has chosen to bring all heretics to justice.

In this milieu, Yasira Shien, a highly intelligent autistic, has completed her doctorate and created a revolutionary reactor that promises to provide for all the energy needs of a new space station, the Pride of Jai, which orbits her homeworld. But something goes wrong, and the reactor sets off some Outside cascade, which consumes the Pride of Jai and 100 of its crew. Yasira is now a heretic and at the mercy of Nemesis and her angels. If she’ll help them track down her mentor, Dr. Evianna Talirr, an even worse heretic, she might be shown mercy.

And that was the week in this writer’s life.

Until next tipsday, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!