EAP

The next chapter: July 2025 update

/ Melanie Marttila

A gradual return to work and change of schedule seem to have made all the difference.

A picture of a heron in a creek.

Life in general

I made some decisions while I was off.

First, I wasn’t going to return to work full bore. It’s what I’d done in the past, and within days of my return, I was teetering on the edge of burnout again. I didn’t want that to happen this time. Or ever again, frankly.

When I spoke to my doctor last month, I asked for a gradual return to work 3 days per week for 2 weeks and 4 days per week for 2 weeks. The week of my return was 3 days, anyway, so I didn’t have to do any juggling there, but I opted to work Monday through Wednesday the week after, Monday to Thursday the week after that, and Monday to Wednesday plus Friday for the final week of my gradual return to work. My days off would be covered by sick leave.

Interestingly, I’d already asked for July 31st and August 1st off, which meant that I’d have 2 additional part weeks before finally returning to full time work the week of August 11th.

Second, I changed my daily schedule from 8:30 to 4:30 to 9:30 to 5:30. I need more time in the morning to get my shit together.

It worked out well the first couple of days, but I had to go into the office on July 4th and exchange my work laptop. The exchange itself was fine, but I wasn’t advised to bring my authentication key with me. It was okay, I was assured, I could log in from home, authenticate, and that would complete the process of transferring my profile from my old computer to my new computer.

Except, when I got home, I couldn’t log into the VPN. After a frustrating hour with the National Service Desk and an escalation to level 2, I confirmed with my team that the VPN was down. There was nothing I could do. I’d have to keep trying to log in throughout the day. Which I did.

I finally managed to get online after 5 pm and sort a few things out. A wasted day, but I survived it without melting down.

Other than that, I prioritized regulation and trying to manage my spoons. It quickly became apparent that I returned to a work situation and project that was both completely changed and not changed at all from the time that I left.

I was looking for another assignment, but that wouldn’t become possible until after the current project was put to bed, for better or worse.

But the change in schedule and gradual return to work were, for lack of a better term, working 🙂

The month in writing

The cutting pass for Reality Bomb continued and, as I predicted, I started cutting more in the second half of the novel. In fact, I cut almost as much in one day as I had in the previous two months combined.

Then, I hit a point where I had to completely rewrite/revise whole chapters. This was the place where I had, in my last draft, started writing from scratch because the specifics had changed so much. So, this wasn’t surprising, but it was disappointing. I keep expecting to write better first draft material. I must temper expectations.

By the end of the month (and this pass) I’d cut 3,612 words. In total, I cut 5,056 words for the whole pass. Not nearly enough, but it was a good start.

I let the draft sit before going back at it.

I finished and submitted another review and started working on a couple more. In the meantime, one of the reviews I had submitted to a journal was returned and I had to select a new market.

My review of Christie Climenhage’s The Midnight Project was published in The Seaboard Review on the 21st.

Then two more reviews were accepted, so it’s all working out in a round about way. Submitting reviews, it turns out, is just like submitting anything else. Sometimes you get an acceptance, and sometimes you don’t.

At the end of the month, I renewed my writerly PO Box and the PO Box for SF Canada.

Filling the well

Canada Day (July 1st) was the last day of my sick leave. I went for a swim and was gentle with myself in preparation for my return to work on the 2nd.

The full buck or raspberry moon in Capricorn was on the 10th. Shortly after, forest fire smoke returned, obscuring the moon.

The new oak moon in Leo was on the 24th.

The second part of Janice Hardy’s “Tricking your brain into plotting” was on the 3rd. This one focused more on the application of the tips and tricks presented in part 1.

I signed up for a Tiffany Yates Martin webinar through Jane Friedman. “Mastering Character Inner Life” was on the 9th. Excellent, as always.

I attended “AI for Artists,” a webinar promoted by the League of Canadian Poets and presented by the Canadian Artists Network, on the 22nd. Good information, but I may watch the replay.

Finally, I signed up for a Clarion event, the “Summer of Science Fiction & Fantasy: Martha Wells in conversation with Kate Elliott” on the 30th. It was a great conversation between two great women of SFF.

My next EAP appointment was on the 3rd. Nervous system regulation and stim toys remained a hot topic. It was also recommended that I get a fitness ball to sit on, as well. Unfortunately, I was up against demand avoidance or maybe autistic inertia (or both?). I did not want to go shopping. But I finally did on the 24th (new moon day) and got a bunch of cheap-o stim toys at Dollarama, a fitness ball, and some fairy lights to pretty up my office when I finally get around to finishing cleaning and reorganizing it. It’s not going to be a big rearrangement, like I was envisioning last year. The length of power cables and the like will not permit it 😦 But I’ll make a few changes to make the space a happier one to exist in.

We met again on the 15th. It was another good session, but I get the feeling she wants to yank the apron strings out of my hands (!) EAP does limit the sessions we can have, but I like the accountability.

In the wake of that appointment, I decided to search for ND-affirming therapists in Sudbury … and I found one! We had a brief, “getting to know you” session on the 29th, and I start in-person sessions on August 7th.

On the 21st, my support group facilitator held an impromptu summer social. It was good to stay in touch because we usually take the summer months off. Everyone started sharing their special interest collections. It was great fun.

What I’m watching and reading

Phil and I watched Murderbot (Apple TV +) and we both loved it. A great adaptation of a fabulous novella. Murderbot has disturbing memories of … it (possibly) murdering a bunch of humans, hence its chosen (and private) name. It’s also hacked its governor module, something it must hide from the corporation that owns it. It’s then assigned to a research team from Preservation Alliance, who do not support slavery. They want to make friends with it and—horrors!—eye contact. But missing sections of their survey map and dangerous, and more importantly, undocumented lifeforms, cause the research team to reach out to another nearby team … who do not respond. Despite its desire to watch quality streaming entertainment, Murderbot must save the PresAux team repeatedly.

I finished watching both seasons of Pantheon (Netflix). The AMC animated series, based on the stories of Ken Liu, explores the effect of uploaded intelligence (UI) on the world. Maddie’s father, David, who was dying of cancer, volunteered to have his consciousness uploaded in an experimental trial. Maddie and her mother are told the trial fails, but years later, Maddie starts to get mysterious messages in a chat room. Eventually, she learns that her father is still alive and he’s not the first or only UI in existence. Complicated by clones, a sentient anti-UI virus, and the scheming of a dying tech billionaire to extend his life, Pantheon examines the meaning of personhood, the right to exist, and the survival of humanity, post UI. The ending is ultimately hopeful, but I have a feeling that there was more to the story. The final episode crams in A LOT. Still, loved!

Then, I watched Ironheart (Disney +). Riri Williams gets herself kicked out of MIT and heads home to Chicago. In need of large sums of money to rebuild her suit, which was destroyed in transit, she is tempted by Parker Robbins, AKA the Hood, into participating in a series of heists. Something isn’t quite right about Parker and his cloak, though, and Riri wants to get her money and get out before she gets caught. Only six episodes, Riri’s story felt shortchanged (like Echo’s before it), but it was an interesting meditation on trauma and love and perseverance. Enjoyed considerably.

I watched Sinners (Crave). I’ve heard so much prise for this movie and it’s all true! That’s all I’m going to say because y’all need to watch this movie.

My first listen of July 2025 was Bury Our Bones in the Midnight Soil by V.E. Schwab. Three women’s lives and deaths intertwine through the centuries.

In 1532 (Spain), María hungers for independence, but the only avenue open to her is to marry well and have children, which she does not want. Though she marries, her every attempt to gain independence is foiled by her husband and his mother, and she goes to great lengths to avoid pregnancy. It’s only when she meets the Widow that her life changes … forever.

In 1827 (England), Charlotte’s forbidden desires result in her being shipped off to a strict aunt who will see her introduced to society and properly married. When Sabine offers her freedom, Charlotte can’t resist, nor can she imagine the terrible price she will pay.

In 2019 (America), Alice has travelled halfway around the world from her home in Scotland, seeking to start fresh in college after a personal tragedy. An uncharacteristic one-night stand transforms her in ways she never wanted, and she sets out to solve the mystery, and get revenge.

This novel asks tough questions. How much will you sacrifice to get what you want? How far will you go to justify the poor decisions of your past? When revenge fails to make things right, how will you go on? As excellent as Addie, but completely different. 

Then, I listened to the Audible Original/Great Courses collaboration Slow Down: How doing nothing makes us better humans by Constance Kassor. Each of these nine lectures, based on a course Kassor and her colleagues designed for Lawrence University, focuses on an area in which you can learn how to form better habits, striking a balance between what needs to be done and what you need to thrive. These areas include getting better sleep, cultivating relationships, engaging in creative tasks, incorporating mindfulness into your day, and more. Brief but impactful lessons in how to live a better life.

Next, I finished reading Thyme Travellers: An Anthology of Palestinian Speculative Fiction edited by Sonia Sulaiman (coming September 5, 2025). Full disclosure: I met Sonia through a Writing the Other workshop, and we were part of a Discord for a while. When I saw that she edited this anthology, I requested it for review.

It’s fabulous. Sonia collected stories from across the Palestinian diaspora, from speculative fiction veterans and emerging writers from Australia to Egypt, Lebanon to Canada and I think the timing of this anthology is perfect. Anyone who cares about the genocide currently being persecuted in Gaza should read this book.

The story that stayed with me the longest was “Down Under” by Jumaana Abdu. Nouran tries to dig her way to Palestine from Australia. After two abortive attempts, a young boy takes her to his sister’s bedroom where, under the bed, is a tunnel. Eventually, Nouran catches up to Haya, the boy’s sister, and the two of them work together until soldiers stop them. It’s a harrowing tale about what it takes to reach home.

I listened to The Wrong Witch to Hex With by Molly Harper. I listened to the first in the Starfall Point series, Witches Get Stuff Done a couple years ago and enjoyed it. Starfall Point is unusually full of ghosts and it’s the responsibility of witches to deal with them. The Wrong Witch to Hex With is the first in the Moonshadow Cove series, and centres on the Seaworth sisters, finfolk, far from their ancestral Scotland and charged with the protection of a precious egg, though Starfall Point’s ghosts are their day-to-day responsibility. Their magic is waning and with both parents dead, there’s no one to guide them in their task. Linney, the youngest Seaworth, is bored with her sheltered life and fond of escaping to Starfall Point. Trying to hide from her older sister, Linney ends up in a ghost tour, and the ghosts are begging her to correct the guide, who can’t seem to keep his facts straight. That guide is Grayson Brockhurst, who inherited the business from his grandfather. He’s about to learn that ghosts are very real, and they’re not the worst thing he has to fear.

Then, I listened to The Second Summoning by Tanya Huff, the second (duh) book in the Keeper’s Chronicles. After closing the portal to hell in the furnace room of the Elysian Fields Guesthouse at the end of the first book, Claire gets used to having Dean, the guesthouse’s dogsbody, around. When the two finally consummate their relationship, the possibilities blow wide open, bringing an angel and a demon into the world. But neither being is quite what they’re supposed to be, leading Claire, Dean, her cat Austin, and her sister Diana on a merry chase across southern Ontario. Claire’s out to return the angel and demon to their respective domains, but Diana has other plans, as do the angel and the demon. A fun, light novel.

Next, I shifted back to non-fiction/self-help with How to Stop People-Pleasing by Wind Goodfriend, another Great Courses/Audible Original audiobook. Short, but full of good information and practical exercises to get to the heart of the reasons (there are probably more than one) you choose to people-please. Very helpful in my own journey from burnout to contentment.

Then, I did a more thorough search of the Audible Plus catalogue and discovered the remaining two audiobooks in the Starfall Point series by Molly Harper. I continued with Big Witch Energy. Witches Get Stuff Done was Riley’s story. Big Witch Energy is Caroline’s. Caroline Wilton would love to leave Starfall Point, but every member of her family who has ends up dead. So, when her high school sweetheart, Ben left to attend medical school, she let him go. Years later, he returns, divorced and with two children in tow. Caroline still loves him, but there are some unresolved tensions—not to mention ghosts—in the way, and when Ben’s children both exhibit supernatural abilities, it makes everything more complicated. When the ghost haunting the Wilted Rose, the Wilton family’s bar, literally brings the house down, Caroline must gather her coven, not just Riley and Alice, but also their two new members, Ben’s children, to deal with the threat. Except that the ghost has a human partner who wants Caroline dead. Light and fun.

Next, I listened to the Audible Original, Alanis Morrisette: Words and Music. I’ve always enjoyed Alanis’ music, and now I have some background to go with. Very enjoyable.

Then I finished the Starfall Point series with Never Been Witched by Molly Harper. Alice Seastairs led a quiet life managing her grandparents’ antiques shop and dating a local lawyer, but when Riley Denton came to town, Alice’s life changed, she dumped the lawyer, who turned out to be a dark and shifty dude, and she became part of a found family of witches. Collin Bancroft has bought the Duchess Hotel and wants Alice to source antiques as he restores the hotel to its former glory, but there are ghosts to contend with, ghosts that may be tied to the secrets of Shaddow House and the Welling locks that keep the ghosts trapped there.

Poor Alice suffers verbal abuse and gaslighting from her grandparents and her former boyfriend. It was wonderful to see her finally stand up for herself and set firm boundaries. A solid conclusion to an enjoyable paranormal romance series.

I dipped into non-fiction again with From The Wiz to Wakanda: Afrofuturism in Pop Culture, a Great Courses and Audible collaboration, by Grace D. Gipson of Virginia Commonwealth University. In six lessons, Gipson covers authors, movies and series, comics, art, fashion, and architecture. Informative and entertaining.

And that was the month in this writer’s life.

Until next month, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!

The next chapter: A month in the writerly life. https://melaniemarttila.ca

I acknowledge with respect that I am in Robinson-Huron Treaty territory, that the land from which I write is the traditional territory of the Anishinaabe and home of Atikameksheng Anishnawbek and Wahnapitae First Nation.

The next chapter: June 2025 update

/ Melanie Marttila

My ongoing burnout journey and the desire for definitive change.

This is a loooong post (mostly because of the media I consumed). You have been warned.

Life in general

I held off writing anything in this section until mid-June because not much was happening. I was trying to regulate and improve my sleep hygiene and just feel my feelings.

I thought that my seasonal allergies had peaked on June 1st, but after a few days of feeling okay, forest fire smoke encroached, and my sinuses started socking in. I’ve been fighting off the sinusitis again. This has meant that my sleep has suffered. So, my rest has not been restful.

My main revelation in June was that I have been experiencing my emotions, but due to various stresses, I’ve been ignoring them. Alexithymia and proprioception issues predominate when my sympathetic nervous system is engaged, and mine has been for much of the past two years.

I’ve been people pleasing too much and need to let others manage their own emotions and their own work. Moving into caregiver territory with my mom means that can be complicated, because there are some forms of emotional (and other) labour I need to take on, but I can take a step back and ask myself if a particular task is something I absolutely must do.

I got an interim medical note at the beginning of the month but, as of the end of the month approached, I was still waiting on the formal medical to be completed and returned. I called the week after my phone appointment with my doctor and was told that I would be called when the medical was ready for pick up. On the 25th, I called again, and the receptionist advised that the form had been completed on the 5th (!) and that I would have been called. No one called me. I checked my call log. So, I went in and picked it up and tried not to have a complete meltdown.

Something else I noticed when I logged on to submit my note to my team lead and manager was that deductions for last year’s leave with income averaging continued to be deducted from my pay. The deductions started one or two pays before I went on my leave and should have stopped. I wasn’t in any rush to fix this as I wasn’t suffering financially, and the longer I let things go, the more money I’d get back when the issue was fixed.

My work laptop was also due for replacement. That, too, I was in no rush to deal with.

With the solstice, the heat arrived. We went from relatively mild spring weather to full on heatwave. With only a portable AC unit for the bedroom, all we could do was close all the windows in the house during the day, set the furnace fan to circulate, and turn on every ceiling fan in the house. Still, it was sweat-while-you’re-sitting weather. Enter heat edema and rashes.

We got a lovely respite toward the end of the month before the heat began to ramp up again.

The month in writing

My cutting pass of Reality Bomb continued. Around mid-month, I passed -1,000 words. By month’s end, I’d managed -1,444 words. I have a feeling (a hope?) that there will be much more cutting in the second half of the novel.

I also finished reading a few review books and started on their reviews. I decided that I’d finish the reviews before getting back to RB. Of course, I wrote short reviews for my What I’m watching and reading section, but I hope to place longer reviews in journals.

I also started writing a creative non-fiction piece, wrote another poem, and made a couple of poetry submissions.

In writing business, I attended the Wordstock Special Virtual meeting on the 4th. This was the festival in jeopardy I mentioned last month. The membership voted to save the organization and rebuild the festival, but whether a festival will happen this year is up in the air. Though a call for volunteers went out, I was not able to contribute.

The Canadian Authors Association annual general meeting (AGM) was on the 21st. Everyone is feeling the impact of funding cuts and memberships are demanding in-person events that may be beyond their organization’s capacity. 

The League of Canadian Poets AGM was on the 24th. More of the same, but in this case, the membership voted in favour of an in-person event with hybrid options in 2027. We’ll see how things go.

And the SF Canada Board had an ad-hoc meeting on the 30th to clear up some bits and bobs.

Filling the well

The full strawberry moon in Sagittarius was on the 11th. I took some lovely pics leading up to the full. The forest fire smoke really made the moon look pink.

Speaking of strawberries …

Summer arrived on the 20th. Did my altar thing, switched over my seasonal scents, and generally tried to focus on recovery.

The new hawthorn moon in Cancer was on the 25th. Overcast skies meant pics were hard to come by, though I got a couple, later in the month.

In writing-related events, the monthly virtual TWUC Ontario Open Mic was on the 10th. I was happy to sit in and listen to some fellow members read from their work.

On Friday the 13th, I watched an Authors Publish webinar with Cat Rambo, “How to Write Captivating Side Characters.” Cat’s always a fun and informative presenter.

I attended the Canadian Authors Association and SF Canada webinar Playing the Short Game with Douglas Smith. I’m not a prolific short fiction writer, but the information was excellent.

There was another Authors Publish webinar on the 25th. Erin Swann presented “How to Create and Maintain Authentic Connections with Your Readers.” It was principally about showing and telling, which is something I still struggle with.

And, on a whim, I signed up for a two-part webinar from Free Expressions. The first session of “Tricking your brain into plotting” with Janice Hardy was on the 26th. Hardy introduced cause and effect question chains, idea baiting, conflict loops, flaw mining, and moral mirrors. In July, we’ll delve deeper into the techniques. I think I’ll like these techniques in action as a pantser/plantser.

I had a phone appointment with my doctor on the 4th and got an interim medical note for my leave as well as a referral for therapy. I have a feeling I’ll still need support after my sessions through EAP run out.

I had an appointment with my RMT on the 11th. Though I still reached rest and digest mode, I was in pain for weeks afterward. I’ve been holding a lot of tension in my body.

My next appointment with my EAP therapist was on the 16th. This time, my assignment was nervous system regulation, specifically stim toys. I’m not eager to go shopping. It’s exhausting. But I have found an old necklace that works as a stim toy. I’ll see what I can figure out on my own before I spend money.

I booked Torvi for her next Furminator on the 19th. With the hot weather, her shedding was in overdrive, and she was shaggy pants doggo.

I attended another in the PFLS sleep series webinars on the 24th. This one was about daylight saving time, its myths and health risks. It was a good session with lots of research on the harmful effects of DST. Unfortunately, politicians do not want to stop DST because of business and shipping issues.

My support group met on the 25th and the topic this month was work life balance, another thing I struggle with.

What I’m watching and reading

During my leave, I’ve been indulging in movies. Brace yourselves. There are a lot of them!

I watched Captain America: Brave New World (Disney +). It wasn’t a bad movie. It wasn’t even a bad Marval movie, but Harrison Ford’s President Ross/Red Hulk stole some of the attention away from Sam and Isaiah’s stories. Joaquin Torres, the new Falcon, was sidelined partway through the movie, and though there were some solid fight scenes, the climactic moment is a quiet one and therefore … anticlimactic. I was also a little put off by the decision to rewrite Sabra, who was an Israeli agent in the comics, as a former widow. There were other changes to casting and scripting that resulted in a movie that, in my opinion, felt scattered. If you try to please everyone, you end up pleasing no one.

Then, I watched Moana 2 (Disney +). The “I want” song, “To Go Beyond,” made me weepy, which made me happy, because it’s been a long time since I’ve felt that. And the story was lovely. Moana is made a tautai, or master wayfinder, and she receives a vision from her ancestor tautai Vasa that she must find the island of Motufetu and restore the ocean currents to reunite all the island peoples, because alone, Moana’s people will die. So, Moana embarks of a risky adventure. It’s all about persistence and the power of community. Enjoyed immensely.

Then, I watched Dead Like Me: Life after Death (Prime). Phil and I had watched and enjoyed the series in the way back and I knew the movie existed, but I hadn’t actually watched it until now. In the opening scene, George and the other reapers stand outside Der Waffle Haus as it burns. Soon, they are summoned by their new head reaper, Cameron, who tells them that Rube finally “got his lights.” George suspect there’s something wrong when she can’t reap her first assignment. Chaos ensues. A fun bit of nostalgia.

I watched the documentary Brats (Disney +). Andrew McCarthy, seeking some meaning or closure decades after the “Brat Pack” achieved notoriety, interviews many of the members of, and actors peripheral to, the pack. McCarthy and Emilio Estevez still share resentment about being called brats that even an interview with David Blum, the entertainment journalist who coined the term Brat Pack couldn’t dispel. Demi Moore, Ally Sheedy, and Lea Thompson are more measured in their responses, as are Timothy Hutton and Jon Cryer, all of whom have had successes beyond the Brat Pack era. It’s Rob Lowe who sheds the most light on the issue and provides a positive spin. They were the new wave of cinema and informed many of the movies in following decades. The documentary ends with McCarthy finally getting a call back from Judd Nelson, paying off the running gag throughout the film that Nelson was purposely making himself unavailable. Nelson never appears. A thought-provoking and nostalgic film.

Next, I finished watching Beef (Netflix). Two characters enter each others’ orbits through an incident of road rage. A massive number of poor decisions on both their parts ends with one of them shot and in intensive care in the hospital and the other recovering by his side. Maybe life goes on?

Then, I watched The Residence (Netflix). This little gem is Knives Out meets Scandal meets The Extraordinary Birder. The Head Usher of the White House is murdered, and Cordelia Cupp, the world’s best detective and avid birder, is brought in to find out whodunnit. In a second timeline, a future congress hearing tries to get to the root of the mystery. There are loads of red herrings, but all the clues are presented as each suspect is investigated. The final meeting in which Cupp unveils the murderer is a bit unusual in that Cupp announces that she has no idea who the culprit is, but as she works through the events of the night of the murder, she zeroes in on the guilty party. Very entertaining. I hope they continue the series.

I watched They Cloned Tyrone (Netflix). This movie is classified as an SF comedy mystery. I’d replace mystery with horror myself. Fontaine is a drug dealer and is shot by a rival while collecting payment from client, friend, and pimp, Slick. When Fontaine shows up the next day looking for his payment, Slick and one of his girls, YoYo, know something’s wrong. Together, the three uncover a secret underground compound that reminds me of the facility in Supacell (which came out a year later), where experiments are being conducted on clearly unwilling Black subjects. The reveal of the purpose of this secret project is combined with an interesting twist that speaks to internalized racism. The ending promises that the trio’s adventures will continue.

I checked out the live action remake of Snow White (Disney +). Everyone should know the story, so I’m not worrying about spoilers. There were a few new songs that I wasn’t sure were needed, though Gal Godot isn’t horrible (?) as the evil queen, and they changed up the story. Instead of a prince, we have Jonathan, a Robin Hood-esque leader of a band of freedom fighters. There is a little more attention paid to the dwarves, which I liked, and Snow has more agency. She confronts the evil queen/stepmother, who ends up being consumed by her own magic mirror. Apples are more symbolically present as well, as a symbol of the healthy, happy, communal kingdom, as well as the evil queen’s assassination method.

Then, I watched Okja (Netflix). Oh, my god, y’all. It was devastating. Yes, it’s another Bong Joon Ho jam and has his signature surreal social commentary. Tilda Swinton (in her dual role as twins) and Jake Gyllenhaal chew up every scene they’re in, but damn this one’s sad.

Lucy Mirando becomes CEO of the Mirando Corp and presents herself as an environmentalist. 26 “super pigs”—a genetically engineered species that looks like a hippo—have been placed with farmers around the world. They consume less, produce less greenhouse gas, and, as Mirando says, they taste good. At maturity, the best super pig will be selected, and then . . . the livestock will go into production.

Mija has raised Okja from a piglet in South Korea. When Dr. Johnny Wilcox declares Okja the best super pig, the Mirando team ship her to Seoul (en route to New York). A heartbroken Mija follows. As Mija finds the truck Okja is in and dangles from the back of it, a group of animal liberation front (ALF) activists free Okja. They replace the black box that has recorded Okja’s biological data with a recording device and intend to send her back to Mirando to record the atrocities committed against the super pigs after which they will break her out again. Mija wants to go back to the mountains with Okja, but the ALF translator says she agrees. A note here: the ALF members are little better than Mirando and are totally complicit in what happens to Okja and the other super pigs.

Things go horribly wrong for Okja after that and though Mija manages to save Okja in the end, hundreds of other super pigs are still sent to processing. An excellent movie but brace yourselves.

Next, I finished watching the first season of Super Team Canada (Crave). This silly and self-deprecating (i.e., thoroughly Canadian) animated series from Atomic Cartoons is … okay? I wanted to check it out because of the voice talent—Cobie Smulders, Will Arnett, and Kevin McDonald, in particular. Also, Bryan Adams wrote the theme song.

I didn’t appreciate the animation style, and the team itself caters to stereotypes. Niagara Falls (Smulders) controls water and is an environmental crusader. Breakaway (Arnett) is a hometown hockey player with explosive pucks. Chinook is an Inuit hero who generates ice. Her shamanic aunties make appearances. Poutine … blasts his namesake and is obsessed with sex/himself. Ew? RCM-PC is a robotic mailbox. Sasquatchewan is their tank. And the PM (McDonald) looks like John A. McDonald and presents as a harried white-collar worker. The stories are nonsensical (I know that’s the point).

It feels like this series was thrown together last year when it became apparent that Trump was going to win again, even though the President looks like Bush (Jr). Essentially, the team can’t work together and lucks out more often than not. A solid meh.

As a departure from the heartbreak of Okja, my next movie was Renfield (Netflix). I knew it would be total camp and that’s what I was looking for. Robert Montague Renfield is Dracula’s familiar (read bug-eater) and in the modern day, he’s still tasked with finding his master victims. In search of people no one will miss, Renfield attends a support group for people in codependent and abusive relationships and grabs horrible people for his master. One of these missions goes horribly wrong when a mob executioner comes to kill one of Renfield’s chosen victims. Renfield ends up killing the executioner and gets entangled in the ensuing police investigation. Of course, Renfield also takes the advice of his support group and tries to escape his abusive relationship while the mob boss encounters Dracula and makes a deal with the vampire. Light and fun. Totally illogical climax and denouement, but it was the palate cleanser I needed.

Then, I finished the full run of Legion (Disney +). Because David Haller (Legion) is the son of Charles Xavier and an omega-level mutant, this series constantly asks you to question reality and rationality. Is what you’re seeing in David’s head, the astral plane, or is it the real (and surreal) world? Is David a powerful mutant or is he truly mentally ill? Maybe he’s both.

David is adopted and when his powers manifest, he’s diagnosed with schizophrenia and institutionalized. Years later, he escapes with the help of another inmate (Sydney) who can switch consciousnesses with anyone she touches. David and Syd are picked up by Summerland operatives and eventually, it becomes apparent that David has a dark passenger, Amahl Farouk, the Shadow King, who has been manipulating him throughout his life. Dark and often confusing, Legion nonetheless has a compelling story. David is an (extremely) unreliable narrator and does some truly despicable things during his journey. Thought-provoking.

Next, I watched Argylle (Apple TV +). This fun but over-the-top spy comedy was directed by Matthew Vaughan of Kingsman fame. Having watched all three Kingsman movies (The Secret Service was fun, The Golden Circle too convoluted to be truly enjoyable, and the third, The King’s Man, such a departure in tone from the previous two I wasn’t sure what to make of it), I was expecting wacky. What I got was a movie that overwhelmed my ability to suspend my disbelief. I’mma just spoil it. It won’t affect your viewing if you still want to watch it.

Elly Conway is a spy thriller novelist who’s trying to finish her latest novel. After her mother offers a critique, she finds herself blocked. On the train to visit her mother, Elly is attacked and then saved by Aiden Wilde, an actual spy. Wilde tells Elly that her books reflect real events and that she must finish her novel to help Wilde and his superior, Alfie (also the name of Elly’s Scottish fold cat who experiences some serious abuse in the movie) take down the bad guys. When they reach Alfie (the spy, not the cat), he reveals that Elly is agent R. Kylle (which she transformed into Argylle) and that she is the spy she’s been writing about the whole time (the whole time!).

Things get surreal from there. Elly’s parents aren’t her parents! She remembers who she is! Elly’s one of the bad guys! But no, she’s not; she was just acting! Then she’s triggered ala Winter Soldier! It culminates in this LSD-fuelled final battle in which agents Kylle and Wilde dance/fight amid multi-coloured smoke bombs and then Elly drives knives into her boot soles, skates on spilled oil, and stabs the rest of the baddies. At the very end, as Elly is launching her final Argylle novel, the “real” Argylle identifies himself in the audience. A mid-credit scene shows a young Argylle to be one of the Kingsmen.

Wha?

I also decided to keep up with my reading while I was off and so there are a lot of books I read in June! Sorry, not sorry!

I read Swordheart by T. Kingfisher (Ursula Vernon). The more T. Kingfisher books I read, the more I want to read. Halla is a widow who’s become housekeeper for her uncle-by-marriage. When he dies and leaves everything to her, the rest of his family imprisons Halla until she agrees to marry a sweaty-palmed cousin, after which Halla is certain they will kill her to get her inheritance themselves. In desperation, Halla determines to un-alive herself so that her remaining blood relatives might benefit from the inheritance, but when she draws a sword to do the deed, Sarkis, the immortal warrior bound to the sword and whomever wields it, appears.

Halla is adorable and babbles in a very ND manner. Sarkis is largely confused but determined to do his best. As with other Kingfisher novels, they end up saving each other. LOVED!

Then, I listened to Summon the Keeper by Tanya Huff. This is the first book in the Keeper Chronicles, the third of which I read a year or so ago. Keeper Claire Hansen is summoned to the Elysian Fields Guesthouse where the owner absconds and leaves her holding the deed, and the responsibility for a portal to hell in the furnace room, a sleeping keeper-gone-evil, the ghost of a French sailor, and an elevator that takes its passengers to other worlds. Will Claire, her cat Austin, and the guesthouse’s cook Dean be able to sort it all out before Claire is permanently bound to the site? Claire’s sister and Mom make appearances as well. A lovely start to an enjoyable series.

I finished reading Beneath the Rising by Premee Mohamed. Described as Lovecraft Country meets All the Birds in the Sky, this novel combines cosmic horror with the story of two childhood friends who may (or may not) love one another as they travel the world to stop Them from breaking through. Sounds improbable you say? It does, until you realize that one of the two teen protagonists is a wunderkind who has single-handedly cured disease, helped stop plastic pollution and runaway climate change, and practically put an end to poverty. Johnny (Joanna) is all that and a bag of chips, but she’s got secrets. When her latest invention, a functioning fusion reactor that promises to provide the world’s energy needs, “calls” to Them, Johnny destroys her invention and all its blueprints, sends her friend Nick’s family into hiding, and sets off on a journey with Nick to close the gate between this world and Theirs.

As Johnny’s secrets come to light, Nick questions everything and must confront the person he thought was his best friend. Even victory is a tragedy in this one, folks.

Next, I listened to The Witches of Moonshyne Manor by Bianca Marais. Moonshyne Manor is a distillery and the hereditary home of the Sisterhood—six octogenarian witches, one of whom has been in prison for 33 years for a heist that resulted in the death of another of their number, who lingers as a ghost, communicating through her familiar, a crow named Widget. A mob of angry men want to demolish the manor and build a men’s fantasy retreat. Another man, a relative of Ivy, who inherited the manor, wants what he believes was stolen from him. Behind on their mortgage payments—the reason the mob is using to validate their destructive scheme—Queenie, has made a dire deal with Charon. The fates of the manor and the Sisterhood hang on the release of Ruby, who knows where the stolen goods are hidden, but when she returns to the manor, she is not the woman she used to be. Enter Persephone, a young feminist who wants to save the manor and the Sisterhood, if she could just understand the web of relationships and betrayals that binds the sisterhood together. Excellent!

Then, I finished reading Christy Climenhage’s The Midnight Project. Raina and Cedric are disgraced genetic engineers who run a bespoke reproduction assistance clinic in Long Harbour, Labrador, during what we might describe as the pre-apocalypse. They admit to being idealistic/naïve in failing to ensure their last contract included a clause to prevent the use of their gene editing method in ways which would result in destruction to ecosystems. Because that’s exactly what happened. The company they worked for used their gene editing technique to produce insect-resistant crops (Monsanto, anyone?). When bees and other beneficial pollinators began to die, the company blamed Raina and Cedric, fired them, and bound them with non-disclosure agreements so that they couldn’t even defend themselves.

As more and more species go extinct, climate change threatens coastal cities, and gangs of hoppers—rogue genetic modification attempts gone horribly wrong and released into an unsuspecting world—hunt humans, Raina and Cedric are barely getting by. Enter billionaire Burton Sykes, who says he wants them to create a viable—and more importantly ethical, even noble—human hybrid capable of riding out the coming global destruction in the depths of the ocean. While they are savvier in their contract negotiations this time, when they see signs that Sykes is not abiding by the terms of that contract, Raina and Cedric must take action to protect themselves and the nascent Ceph they’ve come to love. A thought-provoking and entertaining read.

Next, I finished We Bury Nothing by Kate Blair (coming Oct 2025). This engaging young adult mystery is written in dual timelines. While I think the first chapter would have worked better as a prologue, I understand that most editors and publishers aren’t fond of them. The chapter stands out because it’s not explicitly part of either timeline and is written from a point of view that doesn’t return in any other part of the novel. Prologues are okay when they serve a purpose, and chapter 1 works better as a prologue, in my opinion.

But I digress. Chapter 1 is from the point of view of George, a young guard at a German POW camp in the fictitious town of Westonville during WWII. He discovers the body of Erich Stein, one of the prisoners in the camp. There’s no indication of how he escaped, only that a wound on his head was the likely cause of his death. George knows Erich and weeps over the waste of a young life.

The first timeline tells Erich’s story, from the long train ride to Camp 43 to his untimely death.

In the present day, Keira has come to Westonville as one of several high school graduates to work at the Heritage Site that Camp 43 has become. She, Asha, Ephram, and Ruth submitted proposals for projects to work on over the summer all related to Camp 43. They’re all trying to get the Hopper Scholarship, which will pay for a full university degree. Keira’s project is to solve the mystery of Erich Stein’s death, and the scholarship is her only hope of attending university.

But when Ruth is found drowned after a local party, Keira finds herself trying to solve two mysteries and as the clues come together, she realizes the deaths—no, murders—are related. A fascinating and well-written novel. Loved!

I raced through Maggie Stiefvater’s The Listeners. This one’s a Mary Poppins read—practically perfect in every way! The Listeners is Stiefvater’s debut adult novel, and it was one of those reads that, while I almost couldn’t put it down, I was also already mourning the end of a story and world I wanted to stay in. And the characters! I subscribe to her Substack (surprise, surprise!) and in a recent post, Stiefvater said she stives to create reading experiences that invite return and study. She’s done that in spades. Adored!

June Porter Hudson is the general manager of the Avallon Hotel in West Virginia when the US enters WWII and is blindsided by the owner’s decision to offer the hotel to the government as a place to house foreign nationals (read Axis diplomats and their families) until they can safely return them to their home countries. Tucker Minnick is an FBI agent on a quest for redemption. This diplomatic mission may be his last. Complicating matters is the hotel’s sweetwater, which bubbles up in hot and cold springs and is pumped throughout the hotel. It takes on the emotions of the hotel’s patrons, which is why June strives to ensure everyone’s happiness. But with the Avallon’s current occupants, the sweetwater is taking on a lot of negativity. And when the sweetwater is unhappy, bad things happen.

June is the Avallon. Tucker is the Agency. Can they come together to save what they love?  

Then, I read Tom Leduc’s Palpitations. This is Tom’s second poetry collection published by Latitude 46. The poet states that each poem in this collection represents a “spark that can burn out in the dark or set the world on fire.” Divided into five sections, Leduc recounts the palpitations that have shaped his life. He admits that some poems may be made up but cannily declines to say which ones.

The first section, Freefall, addresses the palpitations of high school, sexual awakening, fumbling first love, and the legacy of familial wounds. Opposing Influences dances between youth and age, family life and relationships never realized, spirituality and religion. These palpitations are full of reflection, realization, and regret. The Night We Burned the Dragon’s Head is about rites of passage, revisiting the past, speculating about the future, and settling into the mindful present. The fourth section, Murmuration of Covid, may be self-explanatory, but the moments of the pandemic, a Christmas without family, queuing for vaccinations, the fifty-seventh covid test, physical distancing, and Zoom meetings are all worth revisiting. We were all there. The Marble King is populated with favourite places, things, people, and body parts, moments of crisis, and moments of dissolution.

Palpitations is a worthwhile read. You will resonate with each moment.

I gave the audiobooks a break toward the end of the month and listened to Dan Carlin’s Hardcore History: The Supernova in the East parts 1 through 6. Each episode of the podcast was about 4 hours long (!) It happened to dovetail with some of the other historical reading/research I was doing.

And that was the month in this writer’s life.

Until next month, be well and stay safe; be kind and stay strong. The world needs your stories!

The next chapter: A month in the writerly life. https://melaniemarttila.ca

I acknowledge with respect that I am in Robinson-Huron Treaty territory, that the land from which I write is the traditional territory of the Anishinaabe and home of Atikameksheng Anishnawbek and Wahnapitae First Nation.

The next chapter: May 2021 update

/ Melanie Marttila

May was an eventful month in this writer’s life (!) I’ll apologize in advance if this post is loooong.

Before I dive into the month in writing, here are your monthly PSAs:

All lives cannot matter until BIPOC lives matter.

Even though vaccination is happening, and countries are slowly reopening, there are still “hot spots” and new variants to contend with. Covid 19 isn’t over yet. Please continue to maintain physical distance, mask where required, get both your vaccines (if two are required), and keep washing your hands. These measures will protect you from more than covid. Stay safe, people!

The month in writing

It wasn’t a bad month in the writing and revising department. Despite the fact that my day job has been demanding in the last couple of months, I’m managing to carve out time to do creative work. It’s less than I’d like and less than I used to be able to do, but words are being written (or revised).

I was still stuck on revisions for Reality Bomb. I ended up completely rewriting the first chapter and writing two more. Now I’m into a larger section where the revisions aren’t as significant. Even though I’d hoped to ramp up sooner, before the first week was over, I reduced my revision goal to 5,000 words. Of that, I revised 4,890 words, or 98%.

I finished revising the story I started reworking last month and started revising another … but I didn’t finish it. So, of the 2,500-word revision goal I set for that, I ended up revising 1,930, or 77%.

I blogged 4,111 words of my 3,500-word goal, or 117%.

Of the projects that aren’t on the tracker, I didn’t do any work on the Ascension master document, but I did write some revision notes for one short story and brainstorming notes on another. I’m not fond of the idea of outlining short stories. Even when I outline my novels, the story always finds its own way in the drafting.

The cover reveal and table of contents announcement went out this week for Home for the Howlidays, the anthology including one of my stories. Tyche Books is the publisher and Margaret (M.L.D.) Curelas is the editor. It will be published closer to the holiday season, but promo starts now 🙂

Work also begins. I should be hearing this month about required edits.

Filling the well

In May, I participated in two longer events. The first was the Festival of Literary Diversity, or FOLD, from May 1st to 15th. I couldn’t attend all the sessions, because work, but the organizers, Jael Richardson and Amanda Leduc, recorded all the sessions and made them available until May 31st. The second was an online course by Laurie Schnebly Campbell (with whom you might be familiar from my tipsday curation posts) on Showing Emotion from May 10th to the 21st.

I also watched the replay of Rewriting Tomorrow (more on why in a bit), a Carl Brandon Society Virtual Panel with Tobias Buckell, S.B. Divya, Malka Older, and Tochi Onyebuchi. That was on the 15th, and I watched it later the same day.

Susan Forest offered a great webinar on Backstory Secrets for the Canadian Authors Association on the 19th, and I signed up for a Pro-Writing Aid presentation on 5 principles of a thorough self-editing process on the 20th. So, it was a pretty full month for writing-related events.

In other self-care news, I received my final report for my assessment on the 10th and … I am on the spectrum (!) If the diagnosis was still distinct, I would have Asperger’s. As of the DSM 5, however, I am considered to be on the autism spectrum. High functioning, mild symptoms.

I must say the diagnosis was a relief. I was tempted to run around shouting I AM NEURODIVERGENT at the top of my lungs. It explained a lot of things, among them, why I’m always exhausted. I’d thought at one time that it was due to an iron deficiency (I was anemic for a few years), but it’s really the persistent stress of having to function in a neurotypical world.

I also had my last EAP appointment because, after debriefing my diagnosis, there wasn’t much more my counsellor could do for me. She’s technically keeping my file open in case I need some reinforcement, and I can always begin a new “bank” of EAP appointments if a new issue crops up, but I think I’m in a good place at the moment.

And … I got my first covid vaccination (Pfizer) on the 15th! My second appointment is already scheduled for September 4th, but now that the Ontario government is trying to expedite second doses, I might be fully vaccinated sooner. Here’s crossing fingers.

Weight-wise, I seem to be settling in at 160 lbs. I’ve been wavering between 159 and 161 for most of the last month. I haven’t been this slim in … I can’t remember, honestly. I feel better in my body. I can put socks on without my belly getting in the way.

An issue that I haven’t mentioned in months (maybe years?) was also resolved in May. Back in 2017, when we brought Torvi home, I took a leave with income averaging. The deductions were never made from my pay (I was Phoenixed) and I ended up with a sizable debt to my employer. When it came due, I immediately called the pay centre, told them that I was sole support for my household, and asked if they could place a hold on the debt until I was in a position to pay.

Last fall, our new contract was negotiated, and the retro pay, Phoenix damages monies, and signing bonus subsequently paid were enough to cover the debt with a little left over. Reader, I paid it off. Huge relief for our finances, moving forward.

It was an awesome month for my mental and physical health.

What I’m watching and reading

It was a big month in the viewing department. I finished watching five seasons, finished two with Phil, and watched two movies.

In my personal watching, I finished what appears to be the final season of Black Lightning. There wasn’t as much drama as in past seasons, and a number of plotlines were wrapped up nicely.

I finished Snowpiercer season 2, and I enjoyed it despite its darkness. The conflict with Wilfred was more dynamic and Melanie’s quest to confirm that the eternal winter was beginning to break was tragic, yet hopeful.

I also watched the adaptation of Eleanor Catton’s The Luminaries. Loved! The actors were fabulous, and the story was fantastic. Astral twins. Lovely concept, just a step up from soul mates. Watch it, if you have the chance.

Next, I saw The Nevers. I enjoyed everything up to the last episode. I didn’t mind that the story began in the future (yes, weirdness, but also—Claudia Black!). I didn’t even mind that Amalia True wasn’t Amalia True. What didn’t sit well was that True reaches the Galanthi, and … nothing happens. She’s basically told to forget about it, and she goes home. It was a betrayal.

The last series I watched was The Rookie. It was an interesting season, dealing with institutionalized racism and other serious topics. Nolan’s ambitions were scuttled by the fallout from last season’s cliffhanger. Chen gets to go on her first undercover assignment. It was an enjoyable watch. And Nolan wasn’t the focus of the cliffhanger this time 🙂

Phil and I watched Shadow and Bone. I liked how they combined the titular novel with Six of Crows. Kaz and his crew were still the more compelling characters. Alina still lacked agency, but I liked how they tried to up her game. We both enjoyed it.

Then, we watched Jupiter’s Legacy. Phil was watching just to see how the original supers got their powers, and I think that was intentional. I don’t think what was supposed to be the main plotline would have held our attention without that past timeline mystery.

The two movies I watched were both DCEU offerings.

First, I watched the Snyder cut of Justice League. I had to watch it in four parts … ‘cause long, but I appreciated the storytelling that went into it in comparison to the original. I think DC realized that fans weren’t happy with the movie as it was released.

Then, I watched Man of Steel. Meh. Like Cavill and all, but I’ve seen Superman’s origin story so many times it was hard to be invested.

I read four books in May.

The first was A Song of Wraiths and Ruin by Roseanne A. Brown. It was dark and angsty. Malik’s hatred/love/hatred for Karina felt a little contrived, but I liked it despite that.

Next, I read Pierce Brown’s Red Rising. The premise was interesting, but I didn’t buy the worldbuilding. Why would Martian civilization revert to a Roman governance model based on colours and metals (red, black, silver, brass, gold, etc.)? It was okay.

I read The Vanishing Half by Brit Bennett, my literary pick of the month. It was an examination of race and “passing.” The story begins with twins, Desirée and Stella. After their father is murdered in front of them, Desirée wants nothing more than to run away. She’s tired of their small-minded town that values light-coloured skin above all else.

But it’s Stella who truly runs away, passing as white, marrying a white man, and effectively disappearing from her family’s lives. Desirée marries a dark-skinned man who abuses her. She runs back home to hide and falls in love with man her husband sends to find her.

A generation later, Desirée’s daughter Jade, an aspiring doctor in love with a transgender man, meets Stella’s daughter Kennedy, a struggling actress. He two become “frenemies” until Jade sees Stella at a party and realizes that Kennedy is her cousin.

I really liked it.

Finally, I read Mister Impossible, the second book in the Dreamer trilogy by Maggie Stiefvater. It came out on the 18th and I nabbed it right away. The book continues the story of the Lynch brothers, Declan, Ronan, and Matthew. At the end of the last book, Ronan and Hennessey had finally found Bride, only to be surrounded by the Moderators, whose job it is to kill dreamers.

They escape off-screen (which I wasn’t all that pleased about) and begin Bride’s “great work” of restoring the ley lines. Declan and Jordan, Hennessy’s last remaining dreamt twin, discover something called a “sweet metal,” an object, most often a painting, that can keep dreamed people awake without their dreamers.

Meanwhile, Carmen, one of the Moderators, and her visionary Lilianna, go rogue and try to save the world in their own way. There are some great twists at the end. Loved.

And that was a month in this writer’s life.

Until Tipsday, be well and stay safe, be kind, and stay strong. The world needs your stories.

The next chapter: March 2021 update

/ Melanie Marttila

It’s April. For the last couple of months, it felt like a time warp. I blinked and the month just disappeared. March slowed down the pace a bit, but a lot happened, most of it good.

Your monthly PSAs:

All lives cannot matter until Black and Indigenous lives matter. This is front and centre in my mind as I watch the coverage of Chauvin’s trial.

Wash your hands, wear your masks, keep physical distance, and stay home as much as you can. The moms have both received their first vaccinations and are scheduled for their seconds. Phil’s registered for the Astra-Zeneca vaccine when we receive our supply. But this pandemic still ain’t over. Variants of concern are on the rise. Be careful out there.

The month in writing

I was supposed to start working on next round revisions of Reality Bomb. And I did start, but I didn’t get far.

At the outset of the year, I was thinking positively. I had worked hard on rewriting and improving RB in 2020. I hoped that the critiques would validate the work. They did. In part. But they also reflected that I had a lot more work ahead of me, and the prospect of that work, in February, when the first critiques came back, felt daunting.

As I mentioned last month, I suffered a crisis of confidence in February (and in January before that). I was feeling like a fraud. In March, I turned a corner, though. More on the specifics in the next section of this update.

I started working on a new first chapter, which I already had an idea I would have to do. Beginnings and endings are very difficult for me. I never know how to identify the right place to start or finish. Part-way through March, another critique came in and it did two things. First, it opened my eyes to several of my weaknesses in a gentle way that broke through my resistance. Second, it gave me a very concrete path forward.

Then, I put on my big girl pants and asked a question of the critique group. The discussion gave me a place to start. The place to start, in fact. So, I’ve started working on RB more diligently.

With respect to my optimistic goal, I had originally hoped to revise the whole MS in March—lol! I knew that wasn’t going to happen at the first of the month and set a much lower goal of 1,500 words. I wrote 1,330 words on the new beginning, not all of which will go to waste. So, 89% of my revised goal.

I wrote two new poems for the Laurentian University SciArt Poetry Competition and … won the community category with “Encoded”! I read the poem online at the SciArt Gala (you can watch it on the Science North YouTube channel, if you wish) and it will be published in the Fall issue of LU’s literary journal, Sulphur.

Just to keep the poetry news together, I was informed on March 31st that two more poems were accepted for future publication. I’ll offer further details when they’re published.

I wrote my next Speculations column for DIY MFA. It came in at 850 words, or 85% of my 1,000-word goal. I’ll put up my referral post when the post is live.

In short fiction, I finished revising the story I was working on last month and revised a second. I’d aimed to revise 2,500 words and revised 3,978. 159% of goal. Less impressive was my attempt to write a new short. I only managed 131 words of my 1,500-word goal, or 9%. The anthology call that I was hoping to submit to was due March 31st. When I checked the site, just to be sure, I saw (with joy) that the call had been extended to April 15th. I’m hoping to finish the story this month.

I blogged 5,302 words of my 3,750-word goal, or 141%.

It was a productive month, but a bit of a mixed bag for all that. I met my overall writing goal (101%) and exceeded my revision goal (133%).

I’m going to have to amend my annual goals. And I’ve decided not to work on Marushka after all and change focus to another standalone novel idea. I’ll have to think about what a reasonable writing goal should be while working full time. I also have a lot of committee work I have to do for the Canadian Authors Association (CAA). It’s becoming a burden, but I don’t want to leave the board at this critical juncture. Leaving would be the better choice for me and my wellbeing, but I made a commitment, for better or worse, and I need to see it through.

Filling the well

With respect to online events, I had four in March. A reading by Asian speculative fiction authors, including Melissa Yuan Innes/Melissa Yi, on March 4th, A Writer’s Guide to the Genre Universe with DIY MFA instigator Gabriela Pereira on the 12th, Lisa Cooper Ellison’s workshop on how to get better critiques, another Jane Friedman offering, on March 24th, which, because it was during the day, I caught on the replay, and the aforementioned SciArt poetry reading on March 30th.

I’m enjoying a more reasonable pace to my online learning and entertainment these days instead of signing up for everything that comes across my inbox in some frantic need to … do what, exactly? Yeah. I’m starting to learn some lessons.

My mom wanted to prearrange her cremation and interment, so I accompanied her to the appointment as her only child and executor. After her health scare back in November, she wanted to get this last piece of her end-of-life planning in place. I wouldn’t say this was necessarily a “fun” thing to have done, but it was reassuring for both of us.

I also had a DIY MFA columnist call, and then a finance committee meeting, an email “meeting” of the board, a fundraising and sponsorship meeting, and a special general meeting to attend for the CAA all in the space of a week. It was an exhausting week. I am not a financial whiz.

In other, more personal, news, I had a follow-up appointment with my doctor, and I am in good health. All of my tests came back, either negative (breast screening and gynecological exam) or in the acceptable range (bloodwork, blood pressure). I broached the topic of counselling and he suggested I start with my employer’s EAP (which I expected) but gave me a referral for psychological assessment should I need it.

I had my first appointment with my counsellor and, though the worst of my anxiety had passed by the time I spoke with her, it was good to have a safe space to “get it all off of my chest.” She also suggested a few organizations that could help me if I wanted to proceed with an autism/Asperger’s assessment. She has several family members who are on the spectrum, both child and adult.

She listened patiently to the reasons I suspected I was on the spectrum and confirmed that my situation met many of the criteria. I’m going to continue in counselling and enquiring about an assessment and will update you in the future about any progress in this area.

I’ve also lost my “covid 19” breaking my goal of 170 lbs. at the end of March. I’m going to stick with my new psychologically informed and reinforced way of eating (thanks to Noom—pandemic struggles require additional support) and see where my body finally settles.

I’ve decided to put health/mental health progress in the filling the well section of my updates because self-care encompasses more than just my efforts to continue my education as a creative soul.

What I’m watching and reading

Phil and I watched what will be the last season of the troubled American Gods series. We enjoyed it. This season tried to bring the series back into line with the book and did a reasonable job in that respect. Apparently, the Gaiman wants to finish the story with a limited series or movie, or possibly find a new home and continue the series. We’ll see how that works out.

I finished watching four series, three on Netflix and one on Amazon Prime.

The first was The Queen’s Gambit. I really liked it, despite the limited series’ tendency toward “everyone loves Beth.”

The latest season of The Alienist was dark, focusing on child abduction perpetrated by a troubled woman. I enjoyed it despite the darkness, but I disliked the crazy woman villain trope. They really need to give it a rest.

I finally finished The Man in the High Castle. The final episodes had to wrap things up quickly and there were a number of contrivances, but most plotlines worked out satisfactorily. It was good.

The last season I finished was Bridgerton. I liked the way Shondaland envisioned the book but agree with some critics that their attempts to address race issues was on the weak sauce side. I enjoy a fake relationship to true love trope, but Daphne’s violation of Simon’s consent (rather than talking things out rationally, or even arguing ferociously) broke me out of the story. It seemed something too damaging to overcome in three episodes. Yes, Simon was being a bit of a stubborn twit about his vengeful vow to Daddy, but people in a relationship worth its salt respect each other.

I read four books (well, three books and a short story) in March.

The first was Emily Tesh’s Silver in the Wood. I really liked the twists on the Green Man legends and the incorporation of eldritch terrors.

Next was Donna Tartt’s The Goldfinch. The story was good, and the protagonist’s plight was compelling, but I got the same gut-twisting distaste from this novel that I did from reading Crime and Punishment. A lot of (in my opinion) needless chest thumping and dissipation. I figured out the twist before it was laid out on the page and I didn’t feel sorry for the protagonist. The betrayal felt like just desserts. And yet the guy trusts his traitorous “friend” who then drags him through seven kinds of hell in as many days including murder, only to do what the hapless protagonist told him to in the first place? Gah! So … I both liked it and didn’t?

I gave myself a palate-cleanser by reading Marcy Kennedy’s short story “Three Wishes,” the prologue to Cursed Wishes. Sad and desperate, but good all the same.

Finally, I read Return of the Trickster, the third book in Eden Robinson’s Trickster trilogy. It was fabulous. Love! Jared’s not your typical hero. He’s been repeatedly traumatized by his aunt (the trickster Weegit’s sister), who’s turned into an ogress because of her ambition and lust for power. He’s wounded and weak and not smart in the ways the people around him need him to be. But he’s unfailingly kind. He’s not going to be the same kind of trickster as his father was, that’s for sure. You have to read this one. That’s all I’m going to say about it.

And that brings me to the end of this very long post recounting a month in this writer’s life.

Until tomorrow, be well and stay safe, be kind, and stay strong. The world needs your stories!